Tuesday, November 29, 2011


I wrote a 50,000 word story in the lovely month of November.
Yes, I know, I had exams. But it's called "copying and pasting song lyrics" okay. That's what I do. It's called skill. I has it.

So, this year, my story was about Alex Fasolo.
And young Alex was playing in his 2nd year at Collingwood, with his best friend Jye Bolton.
Then, Alex meets a lovely girl named Laura (who may or may not have been me- I am like SMeyer, I have to write myself into the story otherwise I'd be a nobody).
Alex and Laura fall in love pretty quick, and realise that they are soul mates.

Plus other shit happens (I have to pad out the story with irrelevant things), but whatever.


(I also watched American Horror Story last night. It was pretty cool, except the parents are a little crazy. I think it's the house. The house is turning them nuts. But I love Hayden, okay. And Violet is very calm, I'm glad the house hasn't turned her insane. Oh and Tate is awesome. I just fall more and more in love with him as the episodes go by. Even though he's a psycho. It was pretty cool when the psycho-mother said that Tate was her son. I was like, "Aw, yay, my two favourite characters are siblings!" Even though one of them is dead. I miss Adelaide. Not as much as I miss Zane or Finnick or Prim, but still.)

(Glee is on today too. Channel 10 are just showing repeats each week from now till February. Tonight is the Regionals episode, where Beth is born. It's pretty cool. And they sing Journey. I wish Darren made an appearance, because he was the initial inspiration for the Journey numbers. I mean, if Finn hadn't seen him, Finn would never have chosen Don't Stop Believin' and then Mr Schue would never have chosen to do it at Regionals.)

(The new Glee episode is on in America. I might download it, if I can be bothered. Which I probably can't. I want to download Episode 8 and 9, because they actually feature my gorgeous Sammy Evans. Episode 7 has no interest for me. Santana and Rachel kissing girls? No thanks. Why don't they make out with each other, now THAT would be interesting. Oh there I go, suggesting ideas for Glee again. You better thank me for this, Ryan Murphy!!!)


Sunday, November 27, 2011

FANFIC #82937

Remember when I used to write fanfics on Mitchell Johnson? Well, don't get too excited, because this fanfic is about Glee. Deal with it.

(Set from the point of view of Sam Evans)

Ah, Astronomy class. The one class where I can sit here and day dream, and if the teacher asks why, I just say "I'm staring at the stars and moon and shit". She leaves me be.

Today, we were learning about the planets. My Very Easy Method Just Speeds Up Naming Planets. I think I will just think about Quinn Fabray, my ex. I really love her, I do. I mean, Mercedes is a good friend and all, but she loves that Shane dude. Anyway, she would only smash rocks into my non-existant car.

After Astronomy comes Glee. I entered the choir room, and people were already there, gazing out the window. I went over there to check out what they were looking at, but Mr Schue walked into the room so I quickly sat down.

"Okay, guys," Mr Schue said, clapping his hands together. Everyone sat down except Blaine.
"Sit down," Finn said.
Blaine sat down.
"Alright," Mr Schue continued, "Your assignment for the week is..." and he wrote something on the board.
It said "A HUMPS". Wait, whut? I looked again, closer. Oh right, "MASH UP". Sorry, I am a little dyslexic.

The next day also happened to be a Glee rehearsal. Man, I see these guys everywhere, are there any other students at this school?
I got there early and headed up to look out the window with the others. As soon as I got there, Quinn approached. Oh crap, should I turn my attention to the window or my crush?
"Hey Sam," she said, smiling.
"Hey," I said, looking at her and away from the window.
"Colour me mine?" she asked.
"I'll colour you yours any day," I said, without even thinking. Oh crud. Now she knows that I want her back.
"See you Friday," she said, and walked away.

Mr Schue came into the room, and again, I missed my window of opportunity to look out there. Crud.

The next day, after an interesting English class where Puck had confessed his love for Ms Corcoran, I headed on to the choir room.
Man, basically all the Glee students are in all my other classes too. No wonder I transferred away from this shit school.

I got to the room and immediately went straight to the window. Kurt was already there, looking out. I positioned a chair, put one foot on---
"Don't climb on the furniture!" Blaine yelled, pointing straight at me.
I quickly took my foot off. "Your boyfriend is allowed to," I told Blaine.
"Yeah, so?" Blaine said, smirking, "We're the hottest couple of the school, we can get away with shit."
I frowned, and sat down sulkily.

So, the next day was Friday. Ugh, if I don't see what's outside the freaking window today, then I will have to wait till Monday. That sucks.
I walked into the choir room for Glee practice, and... no one was there. I was early!
Quickly, I headed to the window.
I had just put both feet on a chair and was rising up when....
"Sammy Evans," I heard from behind me. Crud.
"Hey, Santana," I said, swivelling around and getting down from the chair, "Why are you here? Spying on us?"
"Oh, you just close your big mouth before you swallow me whole," she said, cruelly, "I came to see someone else."
"Well, no one else is here," I said.
Then, all the Glee students walked in, and Santana walked away from me. I saw her whisper something to Finn, and then she was gone.

Friday night came, and Colour Me Mine was fabulous. I painted a coaster for Quinn, and she painted one for me. She wearing one of my old shirts, which had nearly fallen apart.

After a long and boring weekend of doing nothing but watching Star Wars, Monday arrived. I couldn't wait to get to Glee to look out the window, even though the other students were all annoying as shit.
I made sure to get their early, but I ended up walking in the door at the same time as Mr Schue. Damn corridor full of stupid bustling students. Where did all those students come from? They are just nameless extras, at least people actually know my name.

The next day, I had Astronomy right before Glee practice. After a good day dream about Quinn, I excused myself from class five minutes early.
"What for, Samuel?" she asked.
"Oh, Saturn is about to orbit around Jupiter," I lied, "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!"
"Fine," she said.
I headed out, and straight to the choir room.

Kurt and Rachel was already there, discussing musicals and New York and other shit. Finn was glancing out the window.
"Hey," I said, climbing up on a chair next to Finn.
"Hey," he said, absent-mindedly, focussing more on what was outside the window.
I stretched up and peered out the window.
I was so close!
I could see an open field of dried-up grass that went on for miles and miles. I peered closer and closer, trying to see what was so interesting.
My face was inches away from the window, when all of a sudden, I was smashed up against it. All I could hear was laughing from Finn, the little trickster.
This whole window thing was a trick? F*ck this shit, I'm gone.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


Yeah, I have no idea what episode they're up to in Australia.
This is the 2nd part of Ryan Murphy's spell on me: watch American Horror Story religiously until you have no idea what you're doing.

Anyway, I really like Violet and Tate, not so much as a couple, but as individual characters.
It was so funny when the parents rushed to the hospital, and they're like, "Violet, don't open the door!" and she's like, "What? It's Halloween!"

Also, when Adelaide wanted to be a pretty girl, I was like, "ME TOO! Let's be bffs."
And then, when she died, it was really sad. ;_;
It was much worse though, because I've seen Mean Girls about 100 times, so I could sense what would happen. It made it ten times worse. :/

Although, I'm not sure what happened to Violet. The scary evil guy must have kidnapped her. Maybe it was Tate? Maybe it was the cool-yet-creepy gay dudes?

I like Tate, though. He looks like Sam Evans, but he's psycho and stuff, so I call him Psycho!Sam.

Anyhoo, I really want to watch next week.
Why did the woman faint at the sight of the foetus?
What happened to Violet?
And how the heck did that girl get through the cement?
Why am I asking questions to nobody and talking to myself? Is this another part of Ryan Murphy's plan to make me go crazy? :/

Sunday, November 20, 2011


So, I'm reading Shane Watson's book at the moment.
And I came across something interesting.

In the Ashes series of '10-'11 that us Aussies would like to shove out of our heads forever, the English pace bowlers were really good at swinging the ball (especially reverse swing) whereas the Aussie pace bowlers were struggling to do this.
(Disclaimer: I have no idea what 'swing' is, but just go with this, okay?)

Anyway, in Twatto's book, he mentions that there's different type of balls.
There's a Kookaburra, which they use in Australia. It loses its shine after about 10 overs and sucks at swinging.
Then, there's a Duke. Which is what they use in England. And this ball has this awesome shininess that is easy to polish and you can swing the ball all day. (Also, you'd sweat less in England, so the ball would stay dry and hence swing more.)

My point:
Maybe those bastard English pace bowlers were using their special "Duke" ball. Did anyone check? DID THEY? Maybe the umpire doesn't know, and just assumed all balls are the same. Maybe that's why we lost, our bowlers were using the crappy Kookaburra.

Massive freakout.
Those cheaters.
Steve Finn has some answering to do. Especially to me.
And to think... Alastair Cook, the silly mid-on and chief ball-wiperer, didn't even tell me in one of our sexual encounters.
What the heck.

I hate England even more.
And this theory may not even be right, but you know what? I don't really care. I'd do anything to throw a bit of mud at them. ANYTHING.

Friday, November 18, 2011


I went to see Breaking Dawn Part 1 at the movies today, and feel like blagging about it.

Deal with it. :P

Good parts:

  • Jacob's abs. Or just Jacob in general. He was wearing clothes most of the time (disappointing) but oh well. He's still awesome and he's mine.

  • Seth. I love Seth, he is and always will be my favourite character. (I do admit, I forgot his name at the start of the movie, and accidentally called him Sam. I have no idea how this happened.)

  • Jessica. Always awesome, always one of the best characters. Her wedding toast was funny as. :P

  • The sex scene. I know it was G-rated and we didn't see Edward's sparkly stuff, but he did break the bed and Bella was covered in feathers when she woke up. Teehee.

  • Jacob Black.

  • The choosing of the baby's name was hilarious. Poor Renesme, her name will never be on a coke bottle. :(

  • Bella drinking blood out of a disposable cup with a straw. Like it was a coke from Macca's or something.

  • When they recreated the book cover, and Bella and Edward played chess on their honeymoon. Riveting stuff. Edward won every game, except the one in Bella's dream. :P

  • The Hunger Games trailer before the movie started.

Bad parts:

  • The birth scene. I had to look away, so. much. blood. Beth's birth was way cleaner, and they sang Bohemian Rhapsody. I was hoping the vampires would just stop and sing, "I'm just a poor boy from a poor family~". Or maybe they should've hired Jonathon Groff. Oh, there I go, suggesting ideas for Twilight again. Jay-sus.

  • Jacob wearing clothes.

  • The fact that when Jacob had to convince Bella to give up the baby and save her life, he never said "I told you so" and she never said "did you know 'i told you so' had a brother? His name is shut the hell up." THIS IS BASED ON A BOOK. Read it. Learn your lines, Taylor Lautner, it's not hard. (The Simpsons quotes are always win.)

  • Jacob wearing clothes.

  • Nothing much happened, except Bella being pregnant.

  • The fact that nothing will happen in Part 2, except for a riveting fight with the Volturi. Can't wait. I'll bring a book.

  • Edward and Jacob not admitting their feelings to each other and cuddling by the fireplace. Massive disappointment.

Anyway, overall, I recommend you go see it. It's a good comedy, you'll get plenty of laughs out of it. Actually, maybe not that many. But still.

Or you can see Part 2, when it comes out. You can watch Bella go hunting, meeting the fabulous and exciting J.J.Jenks, having tea with the Volturi and discussing their feelings, and best of all, watching Jacob and a baby cuddle in front of a fireplace. Steamy!

(Disclaimer: I made up that part about Jacob and the baby. I don't think they do anything like that, they are a pretty boring couple. Sorry for the disappointment.)

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


...Is one messed-up show.

Basically, it was created by Ryan Murphy (who created Glee) so what the hell was I expecting?
Anyway, it was interesting.

Before I even get to the family, the little girl, Adelaide, was freaky. Sometimes she'd just APPEAR in the family's house and be like, "You will dieeee."
It's like, "what the hell, man, get out of my house?"
(I think she was Down's syndrome, so we'll just let it slide, shall we?)

Plus, the parents fight so much, mainly because the dad had an affair and the mum is still trying to forgive him.
And the daughter cuts herself and started hanging out with a psycho killer. :P

Plus, their dog barks so much, as if warning that danger will approach. It's like, "CALM DOWN, IT'S JUST A HOUSE!"
Because people died in the house before the family moved in, so maybe the dog can smell the ghosts or something, idk.

Anyhoo, I will tune in next week, mainly because I have no life and have nothing better to do on Tuesdays 9:30, but also because it's kind of interesting. Ryan Murphy must have some kind of spell on me. :/