Tuesday, May 9, 2017


No one reads this blog but anyway, here goes
Collingwood are 2-5 on the ladder and playing like absolute poo except for when we play crappy teams  like Sydney and Geelong.

So, my friend Nathan Buckley, we need the following things:

  • 1 x Daniel Wells 
  • 10 x books titled "how to kick inside our forward 50 for dummies" for most players especially taylor adams
  • 1 x quick fix miracle treatment for Travis Varcoe
  • 98284 x cakes for Alex Fasolo b/c he's amazing and carries our forward line
  • 1 x box of donuts for Jeremy Cameron to remind him of how many goals he's kicking on saturday
  • 1 x the version of Jarryd Blair that played in the vfl last Sunday, not the other one
  • 1 x Ben Crocker
  • 1 x Matt Scharenberg (i understand why bucks would hold him back though b/c he's a precious little angel and we don't want to throw him in the deep end)
  • 1 x book titled "how to write cute messages on cute girl's guernsey" for Tim Broomhead b/c he can legit think of nothing RUUUDE
  • 1 x treasure map for Alex Fasolo to lead him to the treasure (me)
  • 1 x a fit Rupert Wills
  • 1 x lesson for Taylor Adams on how to kick to a collingwood player
  • 1 x rising star nom for Tom Phillips (and/or Ben Crocker, depending which one plays on saturday idk)
  • 8248 x jamie elliotts
  • 28249824 x ben reids
  • 1 x smelly fish in Mumford's car

we need to beat GWS and continue our unbeaten streak against that mob