HAPPY NEW YEAR

Yay.

I went to a New Year's Eve party and I feel like blagging about it.
It was pretty cool.
I barely knew anyone that was there, lol. :P

Someone brought a mini Heineken keg, which was so cute, hahaha.
And then, there was a fruit platter (with pineapple, mangoes, grapes, etc etc) and I think beer from the keg was spilled all over the fruit.
So, pretty much, I ate beer-flavoured pineapple. Which actually tasted quite nice, okay. Whatever. :P

And then, someone had a polaroid camera, so they took some cool photos with that.
That was awesome, but when the photo came out, the picture didn't form when you shook it. It really made no difference to the picture formation whether you shook it or not. :/
Anyway, all that aside, I wantz a polaroid camera.

La la la.
It was a good night.
Everyone was like drinking and seemed tipsy (but maybe it was another year ending that made everyone so hyper) and I'm just like sipping my blood-orange-y soft drink and being all loser-y.

Fun.
I gotz three of those glowstick things, wheeeeeee.
They were still glowing when I got home, so when I had to get to sleep with my room lit up like a carousel.
Well, maybe not that much, but you know whatever. :P

And yay, it's 2012.
I hope the world doesn't end on 12/12/12 or whenever the Mayans predicted it would.

I haven't thought of any good New Year's Resolutions yet. I really should get on to that, haha. :P

I was so close with my Day 3 predictions, you guys.

I said Sharma would make 10, but he made 11. Close enough, right?
J-Pat didn't get many wickets, but the Indian middle order did collapse sooo...
Warner didn't make a century, but Huss NEARLY did (and is still going). And yes, the rest of them failed with the bat, except Ponting and J-Pat. :P

I should do these prediction things more often.

Okay, for Day 4, I predict:
Huss to make century.
Tendulkar to get run over by a Segway.
J-Pat will make 29.
Hilfy will get around 35.
The Indians will collapse, leaving Ishant Sharma to get all the heap of runs that they so desperately need. (He doesn't, of course, but you know, whatever).
Alex Keath will get 4 catches in the field, maybe 5.

There.
Done.
If these don't happen, I will eat my shorts. :P

CRICKET: Day 2 of Boxing Day Test

So, after an alright-ish batting performance from the Aussies on Day 1, it was time for Day 2 which pretty much consisted of the Sehwag and Tendulkar smashing boundaries like there's no tomorrow.

Go the Victorians! Siddle with one wicket, plus a wicket on a no-ball. J-Pat with another wicket. And then, cute little Alex Keath as a sub fielder.

And Tendulkar won't make his 100th century this innings. Phew. Only about 7 innings left, plus the one-dayers. And then he will be out of our country, and free to get his stupid century on someone else's home turf.

Fun.

I miss Mitchie J. Damn foot injuries. Who knew that those tiny things on the bottom of our legs could be so cruel?
They need Mitchie in the team. Someone to bowl the perfect line and leng--- oh forget it, I'm just going to munch on this custard pie.

And anyway, who said the bowlers in the current XI are terrible?
I think they are good. Most of them are quite young, but still.

And it sucks that ol' man Huss got out when he didn't really get out. Not fair. Bring back the review system. Who decides that the review system shouldn't be used? :/

Also, I wantz Twatto back. Sulk.

Anyhoo, my predictions for tomorrow: Sharma will make 10 and be bowled by Huss, then J-Pat will get the rest of the wickets. idk, whatever. Then Aussies will come in to bat, and Warner will make a century, so will Huss, and everyone else will fail. Except for Siddle and J-Pat, who add an extra 200 runs to the total.
The end~.

Just another of my great ideas!

They should make an American Horror Story episode that is about Christmas.
Like, an obligatory Christmas special that all shows seem to be doing, y'know.

Christmas is a happy time, all joyful and stuff, but not in AHS.
It could be like Scary Christmas.
And all the characters can bring something, and they all go to the Murder House to have a lovely Christmas dinner.

And Constance can cook the turkey and stuff in her kitchen. :D
Plus, Tate can bring the potatoes. Well, his name is Tate and all. It's very fitting.
Violet can get some flowers, some purple ones if she must. :P
The gay dude (Zachary Quinto?) can bring the roast pumpkins. Wow, this is working out better than I thought!
Moira, the slutty maid, can clean the place, making sure it's all clean and stuff before the guests arrive.
Cam from Modern Family can come back from the dead (zombie!) and bring a nice ham.

I want to write that Adelaide can bring some water, but that's just horribly cruel, and water is water, no matter what state it is from. Taking an easy dig at South Australia's water supply is cheap and nasty, and I shouldn't do it. I'm sorry. :P

I have no clue what Ben and Vivian can do. I suppose they are hosting this thing so they can sit back and relax, and try not to be spooked out by every little thing.

Also, I'd like Hayden to come, but god only knows what she can bring. Maybe some unicorn blood. That would be nice.

Plus, the policeman dude, whatever his name is. He is awesome, of course he can come. I seem to be organising this, so I choose the guests?

Oh and Larry! The terminal cancer brain dude, whatever. He can bring.... a bowl of brains. Mainly for Vivian, but I'm sure the others can have a bite too.

Wow.
This Christmas party is turning out to be fabulous.
I wish I could come.
Really, I do.
I'd make a good guest, okay.

Now, to make this party into something scary, maybe the turkey could be alive or something. And as they sit down to eat, a duck jumps out, and then a chicken jumps out of that. It's a barnyard in a bang! Turducken!

Okay, okay, maybe not.
Maybe Violet could just start bleeding everywhere from one of her cuts and then they all drown.
Whatever.

And they can all do Kris Kringle/Secret Santa.
Tate will bring a present for Violet, some gay porn magazines. But they end up with Ben, who licks his lips and quietly heads upstairs to a quiet room.
Hayden brings a present for Ben, some contraception or something. But Ben is too busy in a quiet room, so it goes to Violet. She grins happily.
Constance will bring a present for Tate, like a toy fire-truck or something, because he's her special little boy. But it ends up with Larry, who uses it to put out the fire that he created in the basement.
Vivian brings a present for Violet, something fun and happy like a funny picture book to lighten her mood. But this ends up with Cam, who takes it home to read to his lovely daughter, Lily.
Moira brings a present for whoever, a free ticket for a BJ. It ends up with Constance, who is a little confused at first, but says 'what the heck' and starts doing Larry.

That's all that I can bothered with.
I hope Ryan Murphy reads this and enjoys my ideas. I'm sure he will. They are lovely ideas. :P

DAVE WARNER. :D

One of the greatest people you may ever meet:
Dave Warner, rocking up to meet some teammates, wearing a mad cool rockstar clothes. :P
(Of course, due to keeping this blog G-rated, I'm not putting the picture of the T-shirt on here, but if you wish to view it, you may.)
(Although, the T-shirt isn't that bad, and the beer that she's drinking could just be a coke or something. Who knows? Maybe she fills up beer bottles with mineral water and likes to tan her body? Nothing wrong with that.)

Anyway, jokes aside, this has been a Dave Warner Appreciation Post. Keep up the awesomeness, Warner, and smash some Indians out of the park next Monday! :P

Fun.

DAISY'S BIG SHAVE

Today, I went to see Daisy Thomas shave off all his hair.
It was exciting.

At the start, some guy showed us around the Westpac Centre (Collingwood's training centre thingy). We saw the gym, the pool, and yeah.
This is my favourite picture:

It reminded me of Kurt and Blaine from Glee. I was so happy when I saw it, I just had to take a photo. Everyone probably thought I was nuts. Which I am. :/

Daisy is so adorable. Two girls did the shaving, because their dad had the highest bid on some thing, idk. Also, in the photos, there is the back of someone's head. Just ignore it. I could crop it out, but you know, whatever.

This is at the start of the shave:

This is halfway through the shave:
He has some hair sticking up, like a rooster, and some of it shaved. :P

This is a side-on view of the wonderful Daisy:
It looks like he has a mohawk.
It's funny.
Maybe he should have kept the mohawk. It would've been cool.

And this, ladies and gentleman, is the new Daisy.
He still looks cute. :D
He doesn't look too bad, though. It may take some time getting used to, but I do like it.

Anyway, Ben Reid and Tyson Goldsack were there, too.
I had a photo with each of them. It was awesome.
I think Reidy and Goldsack were the only players there. Besides Daisy.
(When we were in the reception room thingy, I think we saw N.Bucks. But he was going through a door and I only saw his back.)

And then, I gotz some of Daisy's hair. I will keep it forever and ever. :P
I didn't get that much hair, though. One woman got, like, a whole bunch of it. And she said she would give some to her grandchildren or something, lol.

And then, the best part, the part that is the most awesome: I gotz a photo with the awesome (and bald) Daisy Thomas.
It was pretty special.

Disclaimer: My photos with Reidy, Goldsack, and Daisy are on my friend's camera, so yeah. They may appear on my blag in the near future. Maybe. If I'm nice.

AUS v NZ, Test, Day 4.

In my previous post, I predicted the outcome of Day 4 of the 2nd Test between Australia and the Kiwis.

I got two of them right: Warner made a century and the middle order collapsed.

Young Warner making his first Test century! :D

I got one half-right: J-Pat got Man of the Series, not Man of the Match.
I got another half-right: Khawaja made 44... divided by 2, and plus 1.
And sadly, it wasn't Starsky nor J-Pat with the winning runs.

It was a real nail-biter, and very nerve-wrecking.
Warner was the only one who made over 30, the rest couldn't do much. Some went for ducks, some went for golden ducks, and some just failed to make more than 10.

In the end, it was down to a gutsy Nathan Lyon (a.k.a. Lord Nate 2.0) who held in there for so long and was a good partner while Warner made the runs.
Warner and Lyon made around 30 runs, and had 7 runs left, when Lyon was clean bowled. :/

It was a good loss, because now the selectors can drop the old guys, and bring in some bright and fresh players.

My ins and outs:
In - Twatto, Wade, some other uninjured player (maybe Dan Christian, or T-Pain).
Out - Haddin.

I really want to write MHuss and Ponting in the "out", because they are not performing like they should. By being in the team, they are stopping young talented cricketers from being chosen.
But I can't.
MHuss has been so good in the past. He's saved our necks, he's held the team together. (Not recently, but you know, whatever).
And Ponting... he's a legend, they can't drop him. I know he should've retired long ago (yesterday, to be exact) but he's had so much success, as captain and as a batsman.
Blah.
I'm so glad that I am not a selector.

That's it for now.
Bye.

MY THOUGHTS ON: CRICKET.

Just some of my (stupid and not-so-expert) suggestions for the AUS XI (and cricket in general)-

• As much as I adore Ponting and ol' man Huss, I hope they do not play well tomorrow. They need to fail, so they get dropped and learn their lessons. We need bright young stars in the team, to provide energy and hope for the future. Is the upcoming Test matches vs India important? Maybe. Is the Ashes important? Hell to the yes.
• Haddin should be dropped. Bring in T-Pain or the wonderful Wade. idk, whatever.
• Warner, regardless of his near-50 today, should continue to be in the team. He will only get better. His scores, respectively, have been 3, 12, 15, and now 47 not out. Improvement is evident.
• J-Pat continue to be in the team, but looked after thoroughly. Injuries need to be avoided, this guy is going places.
• Starc (or as I would call him, Starsky) should remain in the team. Less wickets than J-Pat, but still bowls well. Also, he looks like this:
• 

• It was sad when Chris Martin didn't get a king pair (two golden ducks in both innings of a Test). I wanted that so badly, hahahaha. :P
• Congratz to Warner and Hughes for making a fine partnership. It was good to see. :)
• I miss Twatto.
• And Mitchie J.
• Also, I really wanted to watch Pat Cummins play this summer.
• Bowlers' injuries suck.
  
• And getting a piece of metal in your foot. That sucks too.
• Sad panda.
• Alastair Cook is mighty fine. I cannot wait for the next Ashes.
  
• Pup is beginning to grow on me. I don't like this.
  
• I hope Tendulkar doesn't get his 100th century on our turf.
• Fun.
• I hope the Aussies win tomorrow. Predictions: Warner will make a century, Khawaja will get to 44, the middle order will collapse, and J-Pat and Starsky will get the remaining runs. Plus, J-Pat for Man of the Match.
  

MY OFFICIAL RECAP OF ALL THINGS GOOD

Last night I watched American Horror Story.
It was particularly confusing, with the parents' relationship and Violet freaking out about Tate and his murderous ways.

But overall, it was really good.
Cameron (Eric Stonestreet, dude from Modern Family) was in there, and he was kind of crazy (as is everyone in AHS) and the unfaithful husband (...Ben?) was trying to help him through his problems.
He died anyway. ;___;

The funniest bit was Tate climbing into Violet's bed. Oh my god, how I pissed myself laughing. Oh Tate, you nutter butter, you. <3

Then, today, I watched the fabulous new Glee episode!!
It was so exciting, okay.
Mainly because Sammy Evans was back, omg yay! :D
And he wants Mercedes back. They are an adorable couple, okay. I am such a Fabrevans fan, I really am. But come on, no one can deny the cuteness executed by Sam and Mercedes when they look (or even think) about each other. They are ADORABLE. Absolutely, no questions asked.

Also, my picture below...
(I screen-capped it, but it still came out fuzzy.)
You get the gist though. Brit and Damian hugging and singing together! Yay.
After all that shit in the leprechaun episode, I'm glad these two can be friends. Even if Damian doesn't get his pot of gold. ;)
Plus Lindsay was so good.
She sang a song at Sectionals, which was super good.
But as good as Lindsay was, and as good as the Troubletones were, the New Directions kicked butt.
Okay, it did help that they performed last with a 7 minute performance, which meant they were the freshest in the judges' minds. But whatever. It's still good. :D

And Quinn not being so nutter butters and focusing on enjoying her teenage life = awesomeness!
Yay Quinn, I was starting to think you were officially dead and gone. But now you're back, I love you. :)

And to finish off, I loved it when Santana made one final insult about Finn's fatness and said "It would be rude if I followed you around and everytime you took step, I played a note on a tuba".

The above quote is from Family Guy.
You may watch the hilariousness right here:

STUFF.

So, Australia managed to win a Test match on home turf (since the disastrous Ashes series, Melbourne and Sydney in particular).
Yay.

But it finished way too early.
I would've liked Chris Martin to smash some fours and stuff, but no, he had to go and get his 31st Test duck. Whatever.
David Warner hit some boundaries to win the game, so that was pretty awesome.

And James Pattinson, a lovely Victorian, got Man of the Match. On his debut! :P

Fun.
After the cricket, I watched Arthur, where there was a blackout and they did fun things with their next-door neighbours. The next door neighbours knew how to survive a blackout, mainly because their Abuela taught them stuff. And I know who an Abuela is. It's their grandma. /proud.
(I probably spelt Abuela wrong. Whatever.)

And then, I watched Celtic Thunder Christmas Special.
Damian McGinty (who was on the Glee Project and then on Glee) was performing with them, wheeeeeeeeee.
Speaking of which, Damian will get more episodes on Glee! THIS IS AWESOME, YOU GUYS, MY CAPS LOCK IS STUCK, OMG.

And Glee is on Wednesday!
Yippee.
And it includes Sam Evans. :D
And they go to Sectionals (which is located at McKinley High so they don't need to have a bake sale to fund for the bus trip).
And Sam will fight to get Mercedes back. Yes! At the end of Season 2, Glee teased us with "Samcedes" and then at the start of Season 3, they were like, "lol jk". And Mercedes moved on to another dude.

Well, you know what?
Finn and Sam should get together to derail this Shane dude.
They both want Shane out of there. Sort of. Maybe. idk about Finn, but I presume he still wants his football scholarship, right? RIGHT?
(Although, his stepdaddy is now a congressman thingy, so he could afford to send Finn to college and Kurt to NYADA, and bang! Finn and Kurt are both happy happy happy.)

And yeah.
Bye.
EDIT: American Horror Story is on tomorrow. Yeah.
Expect a whole recap of it, okay?
Although, my recap will only include Tate and Eric Stonestreet but you know, whatever. :P

NaNoWriMo = SUCCESS.

I wrote a 50,000 word story in the lovely month of November.
Yes, I know, I had exams. But it's called "copying and pasting song lyrics" okay. That's what I do. It's called skill. I has it.

So, this year, my story was about Alex Fasolo.
And young Alex was playing in his 2nd year at Collingwood, with his best friend Jye Bolton.
Then, Alex meets a lovely girl named Laura (who may or may not have been me- I am like SMeyer, I have to write myself into the story otherwise I'd be a nobody).
Alex and Laura fall in love pretty quick, and realise that they are soul mates.

Plus other shit happens (I have to pad out the story with irrelevant things), but whatever.

Fun!

(I also watched American Horror Story last night. It was pretty cool, except the parents are a little crazy. I think it's the house. The house is turning them nuts. But I love Hayden, okay. And Violet is very calm, I'm glad the house hasn't turned her insane. Oh and Tate is awesome. I just fall more and more in love with him as the episodes go by. Even though he's a psycho. It was pretty cool when the psycho-mother said that Tate was her son. I was like, "Aw, yay, my two favourite characters are siblings!" Even though one of them is dead. I miss Adelaide. Not as much as I miss Zane or Finnick or Prim, but still.)

(Glee is on today too. Channel 10 are just showing repeats each week from now till February. Tonight is the Regionals episode, where Beth is born. It's pretty cool. And they sing Journey. I wish Darren made an appearance, because he was the initial inspiration for the Journey numbers. I mean, if Finn hadn't seen him, Finn would never have chosen Don't Stop Believin' and then Mr Schue would never have chosen to do it at Regionals.)

(The new Glee episode is on in America. I might download it, if I can be bothered. Which I probably can't. I want to download Episode 8 and 9, because they actually feature my gorgeous Sammy Evans. Episode 7 has no interest for me. Santana and Rachel kissing girls? No thanks. Why don't they make out with each other, now THAT would be interesting. Oh there I go, suggesting ideas for Glee again. You better thank me for this, Ryan Murphy!!!)

(Bye.)

FANFIC #82937

Remember when I used to write fanfics on Mitchell Johnson? Well, don't get too excited, because this fanfic is about Glee. Deal with it.

FANFIC
(Set from the point of view of Sam Evans)

Ah, Astronomy class. The one class where I can sit here and day dream, and if the teacher asks why, I just say "I'm staring at the stars and moon and shit". She leaves me be.

Today, we were learning about the planets. My Very Easy Method Just Speeds Up Naming Planets. I think I will just think about Quinn Fabray, my ex. I really love her, I do. I mean, Mercedes is a good friend and all, but she loves that Shane dude. Anyway, she would only smash rocks into my non-existant car.

After Astronomy comes Glee. I entered the choir room, and people were already there, gazing out the window. I went over there to check out what they were looking at, but Mr Schue walked into the room so I quickly sat down.

"Okay, guys," Mr Schue said, clapping his hands together. Everyone sat down except Blaine.
"Sit down," Finn said.
Blaine sat down.
"Alright," Mr Schue continued, "Your assignment for the week is..." and he wrote something on the board.
It said "A HUMPS". Wait, whut? I looked again, closer. Oh right, "MASH UP". Sorry, I am a little dyslexic.

The next day also happened to be a Glee rehearsal. Man, I see these guys everywhere, are there any other students at this school?
I got there early and headed up to look out the window with the others. As soon as I got there, Quinn approached. Oh crap, should I turn my attention to the window or my crush?
"Hey Sam," she said, smiling.
"Hey," I said, looking at her and away from the window.
"Colour me mine?" she asked.
"I'll colour you yours any day," I said, without even thinking. Oh crud. Now she knows that I want her back.
"See you Friday," she said, and walked away.

Mr Schue came into the room, and again, I missed my window of opportunity to look out there. Crud.

The next day, after an interesting English class where Puck had confessed his love for Ms Corcoran, I headed on to the choir room.
Man, basically all the Glee students are in all my other classes too. No wonder I transferred away from this shit school.

I got to the room and immediately went straight to the window. Kurt was already there, looking out. I positioned a chair, put one foot on---
"Don't climb on the furniture!" Blaine yelled, pointing straight at me.
I quickly took my foot off. "Your boyfriend is allowed to," I told Blaine.
"Yeah, so?" Blaine said, smirking, "We're the hottest couple of the school, we can get away with shit."
I frowned, and sat down sulkily.

So, the next day was Friday. Ugh, if I don't see what's outside the freaking window today, then I will have to wait till Monday. That sucks.
I walked into the choir room for Glee practice, and... no one was there. I was early!
Quickly, I headed to the window.
I had just put both feet on a chair and was rising up when....
"Sammy Evans," I heard from behind me. Crud.
"Hey, Santana," I said, swivelling around and getting down from the chair, "Why are you here? Spying on us?"
"Oh, you just close your big mouth before you swallow me whole," she said, cruelly, "I came to see someone else."
"Well, no one else is here," I said.
Then, all the Glee students walked in, and Santana walked away from me. I saw her whisper something to Finn, and then she was gone.

Friday night came, and Colour Me Mine was fabulous. I painted a coaster for Quinn, and she painted one for me. She wearing one of my old shirts, which had nearly fallen apart.

After a long and boring weekend of doing nothing but watching Star Wars, Monday arrived. I couldn't wait to get to Glee to look out the window, even though the other students were all annoying as shit.
I made sure to get their early, but I ended up walking in the door at the same time as Mr Schue. Damn corridor full of stupid bustling students. Where did all those students come from? They are just nameless extras, at least people actually know my name.

The next day, I had Astronomy right before Glee practice. After a good day dream about Quinn, I excused myself from class five minutes early.
"What for, Samuel?" she asked.
"Oh, Saturn is about to orbit around Jupiter," I lied, "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!"
"Fine," she said.
I headed out, and straight to the choir room.

Kurt and Rachel was already there, discussing musicals and New York and other shit. Finn was glancing out the window.
"Hey," I said, climbing up on a chair next to Finn.
"Hey," he said, absent-mindedly, focussing more on what was outside the window.
I stretched up and peered out the window.
I was so close!
I could see an open field of dried-up grass that went on for miles and miles. I peered closer and closer, trying to see what was so interesting.
My face was inches away from the window, when all of a sudden, I was smashed up against it. All I could hear was laughing from Finn, the little trickster.
This whole window thing was a trick? F*ck this shit, I'm gone.

3rd/4th/5th EPISODE OF AMERICAN HORROR STORY.

Yeah, I have no idea what episode they're up to in Australia.
This is the 2nd part of Ryan Murphy's spell on me: watch American Horror Story religiously until you have no idea what you're doing.

Anyway, I really like Violet and Tate, not so much as a couple, but as individual characters.
It was so funny when the parents rushed to the hospital, and they're like, "Violet, don't open the door!" and she's like, "What? It's Halloween!"

Also, when Adelaide wanted to be a pretty girl, I was like, "ME TOO! Let's be bffs."
And then, when she died, it was really sad. ;_;
It was much worse though, because I've seen Mean Girls about 100 times, so I could sense what would happen. It made it ten times worse. :/

Although, I'm not sure what happened to Violet. The scary evil guy must have kidnapped her. Maybe it was Tate? Maybe it was the cool-yet-creepy gay dudes?

I like Tate, though. He looks like Sam Evans, but he's psycho and stuff, so I call him Psycho!Sam.
Weird.

Anyhoo, I really want to watch next week.
Why did the woman faint at the sight of the foetus?
What happened to Violet?
And how the heck did that girl get through the cement?
Why am I asking questions to nobody and talking to myself? Is this another part of Ryan Murphy's plan to make me go crazy? :/

CRICKET.

So, I'm reading Shane Watson's book at the moment.
And I came across something interesting.

In the Ashes series of '10-'11 that us Aussies would like to shove out of our heads forever, the English pace bowlers were really good at swinging the ball (especially reverse swing) whereas the Aussie pace bowlers were struggling to do this.
(Disclaimer: I have no idea what 'swing' is, but just go with this, okay?)

Anyway, in Twatto's book, he mentions that there's different type of balls.
There's a Kookaburra, which they use in Australia. It loses its shine after about 10 overs and sucks at swinging.
Then, there's a Duke. Which is what they use in England. And this ball has this awesome shininess that is easy to polish and you can swing the ball all day. (Also, you'd sweat less in England, so the ball would stay dry and hence swing more.)

My point:
Maybe those bastard English pace bowlers were using their special "Duke" ball. Did anyone check? DID THEY? Maybe the umpire doesn't know, and just assumed all balls are the same. Maybe that's why we lost, our bowlers were using the crappy Kookaburra.

Massive freakout.
Those cheaters.
Steve Finn has some answering to do. Especially to me.
And to think... Alastair Cook, the silly mid-on and chief ball-wiperer, didn't even tell me in one of our sexual encounters.
What the heck.

I hate England even more.
And this theory may not even be right, but you know what? I don't really care. I'd do anything to throw a bit of mud at them. ANYTHING.

BREAKING DAWN.

I went to see Breaking Dawn Part 1 at the movies today, and feel like blagging about it.

Deal with it. :P

Good parts:

• Jacob's abs. Or just Jacob in general. He was wearing clothes most of the time (disappointing) but oh well. He's still awesome and he's mine.




• Seth. I love Seth, he is and always will be my favourite character. (I do admit, I forgot his name at the start of the movie, and accidentally called him Sam. I have no idea how this happened.)


• Jessica. Always awesome, always one of the best characters. Her wedding toast was funny as. :P


• The sex scene. I know it was G-rated and we didn't see Edward's sparkly stuff, but he did break the bed and Bella was covered in feathers when she woke up. Teehee.


• Jacob Black.


• The choosing of the baby's name was hilarious. Poor Renesme, her name will never be on a coke bottle. :(


• Bella drinking blood out of a disposable cup with a straw. Like it was a coke from Macca's or something.


• When they recreated the book cover, and Bella and Edward played chess on their honeymoon. Riveting stuff. Edward won every game, except the one in Bella's dream. :P


• The Hunger Games trailer before the movie started.

Bad parts:

• The birth scene. I had to look away, so. much. blood. Beth's birth was way cleaner, and they sang Bohemian Rhapsody. I was hoping the vampires would just stop and sing, "I'm just a poor boy from a poor family~". Or maybe they should've hired Jonathon Groff. Oh, there I go, suggesting ideas for Twilight again. Jay-sus.


• Jacob wearing clothes.


• The fact that when Jacob had to convince Bella to give up the baby and save her life, he never said "I told you so" and she never said "did you know 'i told you so' had a brother? His name is shut the hell up." THIS IS BASED ON A BOOK. Read it. Learn your lines, Taylor Lautner, it's not hard. (The Simpsons quotes are always win.)


• Jacob wearing clothes.


• Nothing much happened, except Bella being pregnant.


• The fact that nothing will happen in Part 2, except for a riveting fight with the Volturi. Can't wait. I'll bring a book.


• Edward and Jacob not admitting their feelings to each other and cuddling by the fireplace. Massive disappointment.

Anyway, overall, I recommend you go see it. It's a good comedy, you'll get plenty of laughs out of it. Actually, maybe not that many. But still.

Or you can see Part 2, when it comes out. You can watch Bella go hunting, meeting the fabulous and exciting J.J.Jenks, having tea with the Volturi and discussing their feelings, and best of all, watching Jacob and a baby cuddle in front of a fireplace. Steamy!

(Disclaimer: I made up that part about Jacob and the baby. I don't think they do anything like that, they are a pretty boring couple. Sorry for the disappointment.)

AMERICAN HORROR STORY.

...Is one messed-up show.

Basically, it was created by Ryan Murphy (who created Glee) so what the hell was I expecting?
Anyway, it was interesting.

Before I even get to the family, the little girl, Adelaide, was freaky. Sometimes she'd just APPEAR in the family's house and be like, "You will dieeee."
It's like, "what the hell, man, get out of my house?"
(I think she was Down's syndrome, so we'll just let it slide, shall we?)

Plus, the parents fight so much, mainly because the dad had an affair and the mum is still trying to forgive him.
And the daughter cuts herself and started hanging out with a psycho killer. :P

Plus, their dog barks so much, as if warning that danger will approach. It's like, "CALM DOWN, IT'S JUST A HOUSE!"
Because people died in the house before the family moved in, so maybe the dog can smell the ghosts or something, idk.

Anyhoo, I will tune in next week, mainly because I have no life and have nothing better to do on Tuesdays 9:30, but also because it's kind of interesting. Ryan Murphy must have some kind of spell on me. :/

TIMMY COMMANDEUR APPRECIATION POST.

Timmy Commandeur wearing a really cool hat.

I had no idea that Timmy and his fellow Operator Please member, Chris, had started a new band (Colour Coding) and that Operator Please was on a hiatus or something, idk.

How could I not know?
I follow Timmy on twitter.

Whatev.
Colour Coding are working on an EP, and I still haven't bought Operator Please's latest album.
I'm so slack. :/

Anyway, this is Timmy dressing up on Halloween:

Yes, that is a Justin Bieber-esque costume.
With the hairstyle.
He should start another band, called the Justin Bieber Experience. Or, if that names seems to be taken, Bieber Fever.

Cool beans.

CHEMISTRY JOKEZ.

Two scientists walk into a bar

The first scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of H2O”

The second scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of water too. Wh… why did you say H2O? Like, I know it’s the chemical formula for water and all, but it’s the end of the day and there’s really no need to intentionally over-complicate things like that in a situation outside of work”

The first scientist stares at his drink, angry that his assassination plan has failed.

FUN CRICKET FACTS.

For all you cricketing fans, here is "Who is the most annoying player?"

Some of the best answers:

"Steve Smith, he just oozes stupidity."

"Mitchell Johnson, he touches me and I don't like it."

"Mitchell Johnson pinches a lot."

"(talking about Mitchie J) eats very well, and when it comes out the other end, it's very smelly."


Other fun facts about irrelevant things: Nathan Hauritz loves gadgets, and is always on the phone. (Probably just to Andrew Hilditch and it's probably just one word: PLEASEEEEEEE.)

HUNGER GAMES.

I read the Hunger Games trilogy awhile ago, and I never really thought much about this: Why didn't Gale go back to District 12 after the rebellion was over?

District 12 is his home.
Yes, it got bombed during the war, but they didn't bomb the Victor's Village, where there are several lovely modern houses built for the victors of the Hunger Games.

The Capitol were overthrown, I don't think anyone would've minded if people had come back to District 12 to live in those houses.

It's funny, that it's just Katniss, Haymitch and Peeta living there. What about the other houses? What about the 900-something District 12 people who were saved from the bombing?
I know Katniss wasn't too thrilled about Gale's bombs killing her sister, but come on! Gale is a nice guy, he didn't intentionally kill Prim.

Gale and his family could've lived happily in one of the lovely houses, neighbours with Katniss. Maybe Gale could marry some lovely girl (Johanna? Delly Cartwright? ...Effie?), have children, and have dinner parties with Katniss, Peeta and their children.

So, the book wasn't really resolved.
All those houses going to waste, just going to perish into ruins.
I'm sure Gale and Katniss are still bffs and will skip into the forest every day, cuddling in the strawberry patch. WHY CAN'T THIS HAPPEN? WHYYY.

IRISH.

Marty Clarke, the lovely leprechaun, is back at Collingwood.

Yay!Marty Clarke. :D

He will probably be a forward, because the last time he was at the Pies, he was in defence, and asked Mick Malthouse if he could kick goals like Leon and Didak. Mick said no. Marty was a sad panda, because he wanted to kick goals like he did in Ireland, where the crowd loved him.

Speaking of leprechauns, Damian is on Glee on November 1st!!!! :DDamian, who is so adorable. :D

I'm so excited.
He will live with Brittany, who can't understand his accent and thinks of him as her "own personal leprechaun".

Glee is a very good show, okay. Not because it provides me with entertainment and an excellent storyline, it features unicorns, vampires, and leprechauns.

Yay Glee.

MAD MONDAY

Daisy Thomas, dressed up as Jesus. :P

Daisy is the Messiah. He just brought along litres of water, and everyone got drunk. Weird.

Plus, Sidey brought the beers:

I'm pretty sure that's Sidebottom in the Duffman outfit. 95% sure.

And Didak just dressed up as himself in the Grand Final. :P
In the photo above, I have no idea who the guy with the beard is. Someone tall and big. Leigh Brown, maybe?

Plus, these are "The Beaks":

L-R: Woody, Travis Cloke, Goldsack, Toovey.

How would they breathe in those outfits?
What the hell?
What if you needed the toilet?
What if you wanted to have a beer?
What if some chess champion walked in the room and started playing? You'd have to stay stationary for years.

Also, down at Geelong:

Jimmy Bartel, as the St Kilda school girl, with his her hotel roommate, Mitchell Duncan.

Aw. They make a great couple. :P
Jimmy loves to have a beer with Duncan... up in a hotel room, cuddling under the doona.

And that's all.
Stay tuned for next week: Undercover chessboards go searching for Wally, and order a jet ski to speed across the ocean, almost knocking into Jesus having a leisurely stroll, and end up stranded on a beach, looking up at Ricky Nixon and his 17-year-old girl staring down from a 20-storey balcony.

FRIDAY.

I went to Collingwood's training today.
It was amazing, they all trained well and are totally ready to smash some pussy cats tomorrow. :P

I didn't go to the parade though, so I missed out on this:

Sinclair and Faz, being awesome as per usual. :)

But I went to watch Fright Night instead.
It was really scary, I had to cover my eyes when the evil vampire was biting people's necks. :/
But there was Barty Crouch (a.k.a. David Tennant) who was really funny and liked to walk around shirtless and drink martinis.
Plus, DYLAN. From Modern Family.

"Do you wanna do me, do me? I just wanna do you, do you.. underneath the moonlight."

But he was barely in the movie. :(.
I kept thinking he would bring out his guitar and start serenading me random girls walking past.
And he was in the car with his friend, and they were like, "Hey, what's up with Charlie?" and Dylan goes, "He's paranoid. I was paranoid when I saw a carrot with a machete." And then, they died and I was sad. RIP Dylan. I love you. ;_;

Oh and there was this Spanish woman in the movie, and she totally reminded me of Gloria from Modern Family. But I was like, "Nahh, it can't be".
Then, on further investigation (i.e. Wikipedia searchings), I found out that the Spanish woman is not Sofia Vergara (a.k.a. Gloria) but her sister, Sandra.

Speaking of siblings, James Franco's brother was in the movie too.

Anyhoo, it was totally worth it.
I'd totally suggest for you guys to see it, but it's been at the cinemas for awhile, I think, so it's cinema-screening may be ending soon.
Get it out on DVD. Totally worth it. :D

GLEE.

Last night's episode was so awesome, you guys.
It was full of unicorns and Kurt and Beth.

Brittany makes a wonderful unicorn. :P

"What do you call a unicorn with no horns? A friggin' horse!"

Jokes aside, I love Kurt more than ever. His first audition was AMAZING. I totally loved it. :D
And Beiste, Artie & Emma were so awful to him.
First of all, Beiste said that he "was too much of a lady" (or something like that) and "too delicate" to be Tony.
Now, I don't know Tony (having never ever seen West Side Story), but Beiste is such a hypocrite.

Kurt is too much of a girl? Really?
Well, you certainly are not a girl, Beiste! Eating a whole freaking chicken at every meal? Oh yes, because that's sooooo lady-like. I can just imagine some Southern belle back in the 1800's scoffing down a whole chicken.
So, shut up, Beiste. Just shut it.

And then, in Kurt's second audition, where he was Romeo, and Rachel was Juliet, Beiste & co were laughing at him!
The kid is trying his best, acting his little heart out, and they laugh at him.
What kind of guidance counselor are you, Emma?
Aren't you meant to be an outcast, Beiste? Trying to fit in?
And Artie? I HATE YOU.

Kurt, you did a wonderful job at being manly and straight.
You make a great Romeo.
I'm sure you'd make a great Tony.

And for the first time since he's been at McKinley, I love Blaine.
Yay Blaine, go you good thing!
Keep refusing to be Tony. They can't force you to be Tony. Don't do it, Blaine! We can have slumber parties and paint each other's nails with all the shades of pink! :D

Oh and Quinn. She was so good at being punky, stealing people's lunch money and yelling at Mr Schue.
And when she saw the picture of Beth... it was so sad. ;_;

Puck and Beth. It looks like Puck has styled Beth's hair into a mohawk. :P

Beth and Puck were so awesomeeeee, and the Clown Pig that he drew. Awww! :D

I have really missed Beth. And Shelby/Idina/whateverrrrr.
I was so happy when they both came back! It had seemed, for awhile, that Glee had forgotten about little Beth. :/

One rant about Quinn: YOU CAN'T GET FULL CUSTODY OF BETH.
What are you talking about, Quinn?
You gave her up for adoption! Shelby signed the papers and now OWNS Beth.
Just shut up, Quinn. Go back to underneath the bleachers, okay?
You don't deserve Beth anyway. Just like Shelby doesn't deserve Rachel.

Anyhoo, make sure you all tune in for Glee next week.
I hope Blaine still refuses Tony.

YAY DANE SWAN.

Swanny won the Brownlow last night. :D
The picture above is from a few years ago, but it involves Swanny's cool hat and tattoos, plus My Own Personal Leprechaun, Damian Marty Clarke.

Anyway, my point is...
The last time a Collingwood player won the Brownlow in the same year as Collingwood winning the premiership was 1930.

Now, time for a bit of History:
1930.
When the Cats beat the Pies twice; once in the home-and-away season, and once in the preliminary final. (Really confusing, no idea how the system worked back then.)
And in October, for the big Grand Final, the Pies beat Geelong.

Bring it on, pussy cats. :P

IN THE GRAND FINAL!

Marching to October, thanks to pinching a win from the Hawks' little hands.
We're gonna smash some Eagles next week. :D

Jarryd Blair is tasting a Starburst-combination of victory. Yum.

Yay.
I only watched the first half, haha I get too scared, shut up.
(The Emmys were so good, though. Jane Lynch sung a really cool song about TV and how awesome it is, and then threw a slushie in Sue's face, ha! And Modern Family had won about 289383 awards before I flicked it back over to the footy just in time to see Mick shed a tear.)

Mick, with his cool hat. It's awesome. :P

Anyhoo, apparently Jolly and Reidy have hurted their legs, and Maxy broke his ribs? Ugh. Hopefully, the Eagles can punch some pussy cats today (and vice versa, depending on who wins).
Luckily, we've got Goldsack to fill in for Reid, right? And Woody can play too, I guess, and then Alex Fasolo for... I don't know, whatever. Just stick Faz in the team, okay.

Go pies. :D

GLEEEEE.

This is Lindsay.
She came 3rd/4th in the Glee Project, and was on Glee last night. She is lovely, and one of the reasons that I will watch Season 3 of Glee. Other reasons: Damian and Samuel. :D

It was awesome.
Except I don't like Mercedes, because she's just moved on so casually from Sam. As if you just do that! If me and Sam were dating, and then he left to go to another state, I'd be devastated. I would become like Bella, just sitting in my room all day erry day.

And I hate Mr Schue.
He rejected Sugar because she couldn't sing. I HATE YOU, WILL!
And the whole part (or parts) with Emma and Mr Schue were awful. Ugh. Can't believe I shipped those two in Season 1. :/

I loved Quinn's pink hair, and punk attitude.
I didn't like how she didn't get shown much in the Glee episode. But what do I expect? The whole thing is basically Rachel and Kurt, plus Blaine, and then Mr Schue & Emma.
Even when Sam was on the show, he barely got any screen time. :/

Anyhoo, can't wait for next Wednesday!! :D
Hopefully, Damian or Samuel will be there, because I love them so much.

BUTTERCUP

Remember my Hunger Games soundtrack Parts 1 & 2?
Well, I need a song for Buttercup.
I don't want Buttercup to sing anything (that would be weird), but just when the cat is introduced in the movie, there should be a song and Buttercup will sit there, all badass and protective-y.

I was thinking Build Me Up Buttercup, but well, that has nothing to do with Buttercup besides the fourth word in the title.

Hmm, maybe U Can't Touch This by MC Hammer.
Totally.

Buttercup is very similar to Lord Tubbington.
The movie should consist of Prim feeding Buttercup some goat's cheese and Katniss will be like, "...Ew" and Prim will be like, "Buttercup only consumes human food".
idk.
Whatever.

Perfect song: Hate On Me. idk who sang it, but it was on Glee.
Add this to the soundtrack.
It shall be played for Buttercup, showing a bit of his background, such as Katniss trying to drown him and Katniss hating him, and then him looking fondly at Prim.

...I think.

THE GLEE PROJECT.

This is Damian.
Damian, meet the readers of my blag.

For all of you who haven't heard, Damian won the Glee Project.
(Well, it was a tie between Samuel and Damian, but I think it's safe to say Damian won.)

He gets to be on SEVEN Glee episodes.
I wonder what character he'll play. He's so cute and lovable. :D
And I wonder if they will have subtitles for him.
His accent is amazing, you guys.
Well, all irish accents are amazing, duh.

And Lindsay gets to be in two episodes of Glee.
YAAAAAY.
She's so adorable.

So excited for Season 3 of Glee.
It starts on Wednesday at 8:30pm.

The only downside is little Sammy Evans won't be there. Whyyyyy. He was the best. THE. BEST. He sang Justin Bieber songs and Friday and he made them good. He dated Quinn, and she was mean and cheated on him, then dated Santana and she was mean and teased his mouth and moved on to Karofsky without telling him, and then Mercedes who probably smashed the windows on his motel room who is a wonderful girl and totally deserved Sam.

Creys.
BUT ENOUGH CRYING, DAMIAN IS HEREEEE. He will make everything good again. He will fill the hole in my heart that Sam has vacated. He will stop all the crying. He will make sure the sun is shining. He will stop me using the lyrics from Songbird and turning them to poo. (Apologies to Fleetwood Mac, sorry, won't happen again.)

Anyhoo, see you next time. :D

FUN FACTS:

Dayne Beams has big ears.

People who shouldn't shave their heads: Daisy Thomas, and Alex Fasolo.

Ben Johnson is a "grumpy old man".

Dawes is spending his free time doing a Property essay, i.e. uni work, I guess. Massive nerd right there. Not even I do essays. The last essay I did was on Genetically Engineered Salmon and I never want to see salmon ever again in my life.

Fasolo is nicknamed "Onions". You wanna know why? Because when you look at him, you cry.

Above: My response to why Faz is called "onions". Absolutely pmsl-ing. :P

Alex Fasolo has one serious list of nicknames: Faz, Beyonce Bum, Fatsolo or Fatolo (depending on how you wish to spell it) and Onions.

Dawes is skilled at giving death stares.

And that's it! Stay tuned for next edition of the blag: When I go crazy over Alex Fasolo. Oh wait... that's every week. Oops.

HUNGER GAMES SOUNDTRACK -- Part 2.

Remember my "Hunger Games soundtrack" blag post?

Yeah, I have some new additions.

• Defying Gravity from Wicked. Rue could sing this, as she flies from tree to tree. Maybe when she's in the private session for the Gamemakers, they could show a bit of her background and then show her flying around the Training Centre. (Or Katniss could sing it, idk.)
• Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. Something for Gale/Liam Hemsworth to sing. If this is going to be a musical, we need ALL the characters to have a performance. Gale shall sing this in the woods, with no one around, when he's thinking of Katniss and such. idk. He can be all like, "Let's run away and never look back" or something. idk the lyrics. Whatever.
  
• Grenade by Bruno Mars. (or technically, any other Bruno Mars song, they all serve the purpose) This is sung by Peeta/JHutch. He can sing it in the arena, or before the arena, I don't even know. It would suit him well, to be like, "I would jump in front of a train for yaaa~" which equals "get cut by Cato for yaaaaa".
  

And yeah.
Hopefully, I get paid in royalties for this. Think of all that money Suzanne Collins will make from this movie if she uses my ideas. And if she uses my ideas, I will be RICH.
Hahahaha.
And if she refuses to acknowledge me, my gremlins will eat her alive and set fire to her family. Or maybe my lawyers will sue her, I don't know, whatever.

FUN.

One goal assist, a mark, and a goal after the siren, for the wonderful Alex Fasolo. All in about 10 minutes.

Poor Reidy was injured, so little Faz got to come in and warm up the bench.
Then, when Didak had run his little heart out in his 200th, they sent Fasolo on at about the 15-minute mark of the 4th quarter.
And that was a great decision! After seriously lacking in the goal department on the 4th quarter, Faz handballed to Lukey Ball, and BAM. Straight into the prelim, watch out Daisy and Reidy, your spots are totally not there. :P

Oh and who said Neon Leon couldn't play finals? WHO?
Leon was fabulous, as per usual. :D
Basically the whole defence was good, so who needs Reid?

Pretty sure Collingwood escaped without an injury. Epic win.
(Although, idk why Didak was subbed off, maybe just resting his tired little legs? And apparently Toovey had some "medical issues" but I hope those are okay.)
(Speaking of Tooves, he's up for a logie with his Neighbours role of Creepy Pervy Guy #1. Maybe even a recurring role?)

Alex Fasolo ftw~.

It sucks when you get kicked out of the team because the coach prefers a player that either has a broken thumb, coming back from a hamstring injury, or hasn't played in 8 weeks.

But don't you worry, Alex Fasolo is still amazing. :D

Anyway, I hope Collingwood can beat West Coast on Saturday. :D

Two blag posts in a day, but this is important.

I have never noticed this before.
They are, like, twins.
TWINS.

Holy crap.

HUNGER GAMES SOUNDTRACK.

As you all know, or should know, the Hunger Games movie coming out next year.
I don't know if they've chosen a soundtrack, but just in case they haven't, I'm here.

These are songs that I think should be in the movie, preferably sung by the respective actor. Musicals are awesome, okay. Dig it.

• Maybe This Time from Cabaret. This will be sung by Elizabeth Banks, at the reaping. Instead of saying, "May the odds be ever in your favour", why not channel your inner Liza Minelli and sing it?
• Songbird by Fleetwood Mac. Remove the lullaby that Katniss sings to Rue in the book. There's no need for it. Jennifer Lawrence will sing "and the songbirds keep singing, like they know the scoreee~, and I love you I love you I love you like never beforeee~" etc etc. It totally fits, okay. TOTALLY.
• A Muse song. Time Is Running Out or something like that. They need a good rebellion song to play at the end, when Katniss presents the berries. Or at the very end, on the train home. Which will link up Hunger Games with the next movie, y'know. They don't necessarily have to sing this song.
  

And that's it.
I should direct a movie one day, I'd be so great. :D
Stay tuned for next week: when I crap on about Alex Fasolo.

FUN.

My Dream Team lost the grand final.
Okay, I was only in the finals for the bottom 8, and half my players got "rested" in Round 24 so I really didn't have much hope. :(
(Luckily I didn't have any Hawthorn players, lol.)

Anyway, TAYG was hilarious last night.
Basically, they all swapped places.
Shaun Micallef did a good job at being Josh Thomas, imitating his accent and his standing-up-when-answering-a-question. :P
And Amanda was pretending to be Shaun, so she was the host. And she sang "What's A Doodle Doo", and was so good at copying Shaun, hahaha.
And one of the games was Trust Me, where one person was turned into a Human Parfait. Which, to Amanda's obvious amusement, happened to be Shaun. :P

And Natalie Tran (the guest for Gen Y who I didn't know existed until last night, but she's really cool and I am now following her on Twitter) pretty much answered every question correctly, but Amanda, being evil, twisted things a little and poured the three ingredients for the parfait all over Shaun. :D

Anyway, on with this blag.
There are two winners for the Glee Project (who get to be on 7 episodes of Glee), and then the other members of the top 4 get to be on two episodes of Glee.
I hope Damian, Samuel or Lindsay wins. Or Alex, I don't really care. THEY ARE ALL WINNERS, YAAAAY!

More good news, HEATH SHAW COMES BACK NEXT WEEK! To smash some Eagles, mwa ha ha ha. :P
And Daisy comes back the following week, yay. :)

FOOTY.

Faz and his epic boots are cooler than all of you.
Deal with it.
:P

Anyway, Collingwood managed to beat the Lions last night. Yay!

Clokey kicked 5 goals, and is now EIGHT GOALS away from Buddy on le Coleman medal thingy.
I hope Buddy falls off a cliff and breaks both his legs I mean, what? I love Buddy, of course I do. I'd never wish such a cruel thing on poor little Buddy...

Oh and Mick Malthouse gave S.Bucks a spray at Quarter Time.
Either Simon Buckley scratched his key on Mick's car, or... idk, whatever.

My point is, I don't think Mick will be coaching the Demons next year. I mean, I'm sure he has nothing against the Demons and everything, but after having to put up with one Demon player for a year, Mick wouldn't want to put up with 40 of them. I mean, that's a bit risky for his car...

I still love S.Bucks, though. He's so cute, and always tries hard. :D
And Ben Sinclair played so well yesterday!
Same with Tom Young. He kicked two goals, one of them being a torp. And they doused him in red powerade at the end. Hahahaha. :P

I hope Faz gets to play next week. And Sharrod and Leon and Toooooooooves. All those awesome people that came from Perth. :)

Top of the ladder, yo.

GLEE PROJECT.

This lovely girl was eliminated from The Glee Project last night.
BLAH.
Her name was Marissa and she had banana earrings. YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID, RYAN MURPHY.

The episode was tenacity (with Karofsky chucking slushies at them!) or TE-NASTY as Alex said.

If you don't know Alex, he's one of the contestants on The Glee Project. GET WITH THE PROGRAM. Geez.
And he would be the offspring of Kurt and Mercedes, if they had children together.
And he's like tall and big and everything, so he comes across as really tough and strong, yet when he talks, his voice is like a girl's, so he's all sweet and soft.
Aw. :)

What's the point of this blag post, I hear you ask?
Well, there's no point. Since when have you read a post on here that has a point? You just wasted about 5 minutes of your life that you will never get back. :P

ALEX FASOLO AND THE GLEE PROJECT.

Daicos who?

And Collingwood wins another one, yay!

An awesome number 35 kicked a goal and took a specky because he's awesome and everything. :P
Just take the whole bus, Alex Fasolo.
Congratulations on your existence. :D

Not all good news, with one of my favourites on The Glee Project getting eliminated.
HOW DARE THEY?
The really short guy, Matheus, who's like shorter than Jarryd Blair (I know, it's ridiculous, how could little Blairy be taller than anyone?) got eliminated. Sulk.
He was so cool.

But it's okay.
Damian is still there (he's the Irish one) and Lindsay and Samuel. :)
And I really like Marissa too. She's got red hair and is really pretty and I didn't really notice her till last night's episode. :/

But it was funny how Cameron got kissed by Lindsay, and rang his mum to cry about it because he's all Christian and stuff.
Like, if I were in Cameron's position, being kissed by Lindsay (or anyone, for that matter), I'd call EVERYONE and be like, "I just got kissed! GET THE CAKE AND BALLOONS OUT, PARTY TIEMZZZ!"
And we'd all celebrate me not being a kissing virgin anymore. Yay.

Fun.

Top of the ladder, yo.

FOOTY.

Happy 250th, Taz. :)

Half good and half bad weekend of footy.
Collingwood won.
Freo lost. :(
My Dream Team and Supercoach lost, ugh.
I lost to one of the bottom teams in the Dream Team. So annoying. Two of my players were injured, and, of course, I didn't have a reserve. FAIL WHALE.

So, I probably won't get to be 6th on the ladder. Still stuck in 8th, or if I'm really unlucky, NINTH.
Blah.

There's more bad news.
Travis Cloke, ex-sufferer of the dreaded yips, caught up to Buddy Franklin on the Coleman medal goalkicking thingy.
And then, today, Buddy just had to go and kick 3 goals. WHAT EVEN.
(And to make matters worse, Riewoldt kicked 4 goals and is equal with Buddy.)

WHY? WHYYYY?
Why didn't I break Buddy's legs?
:P

(Quotes from Futurama are very bubbly-making.)

THE FUTUREEEEEEEE

Heath Shaw will jet off to the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing.

I called it. I totally wrote, on a previous blag post, that this will happen. I predicted THE FUTURE.
Hahahaha.

By the way, the Powerball numbers are 2, 13, 17, 22, 32 and the PB is 35.
Enjoy. :)
Also, there will be hoverboards in the near future. With crash bracelets and belly sensors and grippy shoes.

(After reading the Uglies trilogy by Scott Westerfeld, I want a hoverboard. Hurry up and invent them, you inventors! What are you doing? Why do I not have my hoverboard yet? What is taking so long?)

Whatever.

FOOTY.

Ben Sinclair, doused in Powerade. :D

Massive comeback by the mighty Pies!
Down by 30 points or something, but there was never a doubt for them EVER.

Alex Fasolo (above) kicked a 5-faaaa, putting his AFL goal tally to 9. He has kicked the second-highest amount of goals at Collingwood in a number 35 jumper.
He may get a Rising Star nomination (yay!) and hopefully, a spot in the team when all the other players get back from injury. :P

And Clokey is only THREE GOALS away from Buddy Franklin for the Coleman medal.
Yay.

Such a good win.
Hopefully, Daisy can come back next week. Surely a corked thigh can't be THAT bad.
I mean, that Hardingham dude was running around today with a corked leg. Yes, he may have been sore at some points and really should've had a rest, but he was out there for pretty much the whole game. *shrug*

Essendon had so many injuries, though. Basically, that's probably how they lost, not having many interchanges.
I suppose that is the worst thing about being a top team, injuries are more likely if your team is working hard, all day at training, in the gym, at a game, trying to improve.

Top of the ladder, yo.

HARRY POTTER!!

Took me about two weeks, but I finally saw Harry Potter 7 and a 1/2.

It was AWESOME.
Move over Fabrevans, I like Romione so much more.
When they were in the Chamber of Secrets, the moment was so bubbly and then, out of nowhere, the kiss! It was wonderful, and magical and I.. um.. kind of squealed a little bit. Shut up.

Romione have such cute moments, though. Like, in the 6th movie, with Ron in hospital, and Lavender Brown was all like, "WON-WON" and Ron was like, "Err-my-nee" and it was like ADORABLE and BUBBLY and ahhhhhh.

Anyway, whatever.
I loved the Neville killing Nagini part (I silently clapped at that part), the "you and whose army" bit, the awkward hug with Draco and Voldemort (lol), Snape and Lily (Snape: Always. Me: CREYS), Snape in general, Fred Weasley (noooo!), when McGonagall said, "I've always wanted to use that spell" and I went "Nawww" cos she's so cute, Molly Weasley, etc etc.

And, of course, when Harry broke the elder wand and I channeled my inner Damian (from Mean Girls) and gasped.

All in all, AMAZING.
You should go and see it.
All of you.
Why are you all still sitting here? You already saw it? SEE IT AGAIN.

P.S. lol, I almost left the cinema before the movie even started. They had a preview for Breaking Dawn and I was like, "No. You don't even go here." Rude. But I stayed and commentated the whole preview to my friend, who's never read the book. I was like, "That's the sex scene. That's where she's preggerz. The baby eats her. They have to dig the baby out. Bella nearly dies." etc etc. (But the sex scene was pretty cool, they were in bed and the whole roof nearly collapsed. Or something. I think that was the sex scene. Whatever.)

EDIT: But I like Twilight okay, don't get me wrong. It's good, I read the books, they were fabulous, I watched the first two movies, they were fabulous.
I just disagree with splitting Breaking Dawn into two movies.
Yes, the last Harry Potter movie was split into two, but that was because there was SO MUCH in the book, jam packed with SO MUCH.
What happens in Breaking Dawn? A wedding, a sex scene, preggerz, baby tries to kill Bella from inside, Bella nearly dies, Bella changes into vampire, pedo-wolf, Bella adjusts to being a vampire, Bella finds J.Jenks, a "fight" with the Volturi, happy ending.

Not much involved.
Surely SMeyer has enough money.
Her house is solid gold.
She sleeps on a bed made out of money.
SURELY, this stupid movie does not need to be broken up into two movies.
What the hell.

The fight was only good, because it involved Bella wanting to fight, wanting to save her friends, her baby, her new vampire family.
And if Bella didn't put the shield up, the Volturi's attack would've been stupid, their fighting technique wasn't very... interesting.
It didn't involve wands and magic. It didn't involve running and chasing their enemies. It just... was through the mind. Which is lame. Sorry, Stephenie Meyer, your book is really good. Just... idk.

Cooool.

Did I mention how I got 8 in my footy tipping last weekend?
Well, I DID.
:P

And my Dream Team won, and is now in the Top 8 on the ladder! Go me.
And for the last home-and-away Dream Team round, I am playing one of the bottom teams.
All I have to do is thrash the poor sucker, and 6th place is MINE.
So bubbly-making.

In other news, I'm reading the Uglies series at the moment.
It is very exciting.
I'm up to the 3rd book, Specials.
Basically, I totally shipped Tally & David, and then when Zane came along.. Well, Zane kind of rocked my world.

And Dr Cable is awful. But that's her job, so I guess it's okay.
But it's not Maddy's job to be cruel, yet she is so mean to Tally.
Okay, her husband died and it was all Tally's fault. Fair enough. But it's not ALL Tally's fault. Yes, she betrayed the Smoke, I get it. But Maddy knew about the risks of escaping the city, she knew what the Specials would do to someone who knows the truth about the operation.
She KNEW.
Why is she being a bitch to Tally?
Because Tally ruined her and her family's life and home?
Because David loves Tally so much and Tally goes and dates another guy?
Because David still has feelings for Tally, pretty or not?

Screw Maddy.
No wonder Tally didn't choose David at the end of the Pretties book.
It wasn't to do with Zane's big beautiful eyes, and his gorgeous pretty face.
It wasn't that David was ugly and Tally didn't want to look at him.
It was his MOTHER. His psycho-bitch mother, controlling him, informing him that pretty people aren't the same as when they were ugly.
Well, Maddy, I think Tally has proved that she CAN be the same, due to some bubbly activities and whatever, you're totally wrong. Go away.

A bit of a rant and a few spoilers, but DEAL WITH IT. :P
Also, Zane is a really cool name. I want one of my children to be named Zane. Or, as I will be a crazy cat lady in the future, one of my cats.

TV.

This is Hayden.
Eliminated from Masterchef just before the final 5.

It is sad that he left. Utterly bogus.
He was one of the best cooks in the competition and was so hot, he could easily melt butter.

So, there goes my viewing of Masterchef.
But I've found a better reality TV show.
THE GLEE PROJECT.
Heard of it?
It's like American Idol, as they have auditions and from those auditionees, they choose a top 12 and eliminate a contestant every week.
But instead of a record deal and some cash, the winner gets a few episodes on Glee. :D

I have my favourites.
Damian, who has an Irish accent and I just wish he could talk FOREVERRR.
Ellis, who is so tiny and cute and looks like a 10-year-old. (But she got eliminated, so much creys.)
Lindsay. Massive bitch-making, hahaha. Entertaining, utterly. :P
Alex. He's a guy with a girl's voice, what more could you want? I said, WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT? That's right, nothing. NOTHING.
Samuel. Totally.
The short guy, Matheus or whatever. He sang Gives You Hell and I nearly died from all the awesomeness. Ah.

And that is all, my pretty-minded friends.
Tune in to The Glee Project on Friday nights on Eleven, if you're not too busy with your important lives.

For someone who has so many different hair colours that they've forgotten their natural shade, Jason Akermanis is so right.

Usually I skip over his articles, they're just his weird opinions, usually about some bogus thing that I have no interest in whatsoever.

But he's really hit the nail on the head with this one.
Here I was, thinking that Heath Shaw's penalty was fair, that the bet was stupid and totally against the rules and Heath deserved every part of the penalty.
But compared to other things, other events that have happened in the wide world of football, a $10 bet is not so bad.

Read the article, dudes. Go and read about Jason Akermanis' bubbly opinions, showing that the AFL aren't always fair, dishing out their penalties and stuff.
:P

FUN.

Good weekend of footy.

Collingwood won.
Melbourne won.
Freo won.
My Supercoach team won.
...and my Dream Team lost. (But I made over 2000 points, so surely that's a good thing, am I right?)

The coolest person you will ever meet. :D

Although, my footy tips didn't go very well, I only got 3. But when do I ever go well in footy tipping?
NEVER.
I completely suck at it.
Why do I even bother?

Heath Shaw. :/

Ugh.
8-week suspension for Heath Shaw, for betting on Nick Maxwell kicking the first goal in Round 9.
8 weeks, from Round 17 to 24.
I hope he learns his lesson, and doesn't do anything silly for the next 8 weeks, so that he doesn't have to carry out the full 14 weeks. That would suck.

But due to my optimism and looking on the bright side, here are the positives:

• He learned his lesson from that other scandal, the drunk driving thing. I don't think Heath will LIE about this, DENY that he had this bet. That would get him in a much bigger pickle.
• My Supercoach team is already crap, I knew that already. I'm on the bottom, or near to it, and I just made a substitution for Heath Shaw. All is well, on that account.
• It's about time Shaw had a rest, he's been a super player, always playing well, working hard, dishing out instructions to everyone, including the coach and captain. There are several younger players, waiting in the wings, ready to play. S.Bucks and Goldsack, maybe Macaffer could play Shaw's role?
  
• My Dream Team doesn't have Heath Shaw. That's gotta be a good thing, right? RIGHT?!
• He can still play in the finals, if he's a good boy.

Maybe Heath Shaw can go on a holiday to Arizona.
Didak and Dawes and Dayne Beams can go too, a nice relaxing time in the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing. They all could do with a bit of healing, with Didak, Dawes and Beams all injured and Shaw in desperate need of a few brain cells.

Maybe the little pixies and their fairy dust can weave their magic, creating hundreds and hundreds of grey matter, enough to fill the space between Heath Shaw's ears. (And mine too, I wouldn't mind some of those cells, to close my gap.)

And yeah.

YAY.

Fun fact: Collingwood has never beaten North Melbourne by more than 113 points since 1926 or something.

And, much to the radio commentators' excitement (and mine), the Pies made history, thrashing the Kangas by 117 points.
Steele Sidebottom, in his 50th game, kicked 4 goals. :D
And Lachlan Keeffe made his debut, took a few strong marks, etc.

2nd-gamer Lukey Rounds had the job on Brent Harvey, and holy crap, he actually did a good job! Rounds managed to stick with the Kangas skipper for most of the day, limiting him to 2 goals and just 12 disposals.

Swanny is well and truly fit from his relaxing holiday at the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing. He managed about 38 disposals, and 2 goals.

Not all good news for Collingwood, with my pretend boyfriend Daisy Thomas getting an ankle injury just before half time.
I'm not really sure what happened, but he came back on the field in the 3rd quarter and got some possessions and another goal, so I thought that everything was okay.
But just before 3/4 time, Daisy was substituted, so the ankle injury must have been worse. idk.

Oh and Alex Fasolo managed to keep up his 1-goal-per-game quota. Four for you, Alex, go you good thing!!

Top of the ladder, yo.

FRIDAY NIGHTS AT ZOIDBERG'S.

I went to La Porchetta on Friday night, and then, after a nutritious dinner of pizza and chips, we went outside in the freezing cold, across the parking lot to McDonald's.
Then, as we shivered from a brief exposure to the cold, we got soft serve cones/sundaes/mcflurries for dessert.

True story of me and my friends' insanity, and the fact that I still do not know where to put the apostrophes.

SPOILERS AHOY!

This is in the preview for Masterchef on Wednesday night.
We know that Dani gets into an immunity challenge, we found out last night.
But does she win?
Well, this is usually answered on Tuesday night, when the immunity challenge is done.

But they already showed a preview of the wednesday night's episode.
And they showed Dani.
And if you look closely (at the picture below), there's a little gold badge on her apron.

SHE WON AN IMMUNITY PIN.


Hahaha.
Go Dani.
:D

FUN.

Collingwood are one step closer to being Top Of The Ladder again.

Because Essendon beat the pussy cats.
Hahahaha.
:P

Basically, Collingwood and Geelong have the same amount of losses and once Geelong have their second bye, we're moving on up to higher ground, where the grass is greener, the view is magnificent, and the food is fabulous. We don't have to sit underneath, waiting for the scraps, having poop and kitty litter falling on our heads.

It will be marvelous.