ZOMBIES VS UNICORNS.

So, I just finished reading Zombies vs Unicorns. It is an anthology of short stories, with different authors writing either a zombie or unicorn story.

I just want to say: Before I read the book, I was not really Team Unicorn or Team Zombie. But I kind of liked unicorns so yeah.
But the team captain for unicorns, Holly Black, didn't really convince me that unicorns were better.

It was Justine L. (whose surname I can't spell because it's way too long; why she didn't use "Westerfeld" I will never know, omg, feminists* amirite?**) who convinced me that zombies were way cool and I should totally switch to their side. She makes a good argument. I loved her descriptions before each story. <3.

I will now comment on each story. I will try not to spoil them too much. I will give the stories a rating out of 5. :P

1. The Highest Justice by Garth Nix (unicorns)
This was kind of weird, just a princess who was mad at her father or something. Didn't really yell "UNICORNS ARE THE GREATEST" to me. It was meh.
2/5.

2. Love Will Tear Us Apart by Alaya Dawn Johnson (zombies)
Now, this story was good.
It was about a zombie-type guy who was in love with this boy. (Gay love!)
Written so well, and now I want to read the author's novel, Moonshine.
Loved the title, but it reminded me of The Wombats and only a bit of Joy Division. Haha. :P
And the zombie dude liked the boy because he smelt like macaroni and cheese. And they had similar taste in music.
But the boy's dad was an ex-cop or something. And the dad was forcing his son to defeat zombies and evil monsters.
5/5.

3. Purity Test by Naomi Novak (unicorns)
Again, this unicorn story didn't really rock my world.
It was about a unicorn who was wandering the streets of New York, and found a hungover girl lying on a park bench. Then the unicorn asked the girl for help, and they went to some evil wizard's house (no, not Voldemort!) and it was all weird and shit.
It had some amusing things though, like how they got the troll guy to sleep. :P
3/5.

4. Bougainvillea by Carrie Ryan (zombies)
This was kind of weird, it was about a girl who lived on an island with several adults. And her dad was the leader.
I didn't find it very interesting, except when the pirate/zombie came to rescue the girl and said that her dad was a terrible ruler. I cried a little, and thought he was so romantic, like the hero who saves the damsel in distress.
lol yeah. It was okay.
2/5.

5. A Thousand Flowers by Margo Lanagan (unicorns)
This started off really well, with the guy looking for somewhere to pee. And he came across a unicorn, then found a girl lying in the grass.
And then some police-y people came, and arrested the guy, accusing him of something he didn't do.
But he was set free after a trial, and sent home.
Then they found out the girl was pregnant, so the police-y people visited the guy and killed him.
And then, it got weird.
So weird, that I barely understood it. :/
1/5.

6. The Children of the Revolution by Maureen Johnson (zombies)
This story was SO BRILLIANT.
It was freaky and crazy and so amazing.
A girl from America had gone to England to work for these farm people because her then-boyfriend had told her to. She hated the farm work, so this Angelina Jolie-esque woman offered for the girl to baby-sit some children.
The girl accepted (anything to get out of picking blackberries with little pay), and the actress gave the girl so much pay, comfy bed, all-she-could-eat food, and all she had to do with the children was put their food on a conveyor belt when it was feeding time.
It was too good to be true. The girl knew something was suss but couldn't figure it out.
So, at around midnight, the girl checked on the children to make sure they were okay.
The children were pressed up against the fence of their enclosure.
The girl was worried, as it's midnight and the children should be in bed.
So she thought "maybe they need a hug". So... she opened the gate to comfort these poor kids.
The kids ran straight to her and start to bite her.
The girl was like, "holy crap", and quickly got the hell out.
(Sorry for the spoilers).
Anyway, it was really good. :D
5/5.

7. The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn by Diana Peterfreund (unicorns)
This story was also really good.
It was about a girl with really religious parents. And they lived in a town that had just been victim to killer unicorn attacks. And this girl, her cousins were killed by the unicorn.
Anyway, this girl and her friends go to a fair. And there's a unicorn exhibit.
Blah blah, the unicorn is preggerz, and it gives birth, blah blah, the owner tries to drown the baby, but the girl quickly saves it and takes it home to care for it in her garage.
The unicorn, under the girl's care, gets bigger and bigger, and the girl feels guiltier and guiltier because she's raising a weapon that could kill the entire town (or something).
It's so good.
Read it for yourself.
Amazing. :D
5/5.

8. Inoculata by Scott Westerfeld (zombies)
This story was pretty good, but not as good as the previous two.
I loved the main girl (Ally) had a crush on another girl. (Gay love!)
And then the four kids all ran away together from the adults, hahahaha.
Sorry for the spoiler.
Oops.
But the girl that Ally had a crush on liked one of the boys. :(.
Whatev.
4/5.

9. Princess Prettypants by Meg Cabot (unicorns)
This story was amazing.
I loved it.
So well written and interesting.
Not going to go into detail, but I totally enjoyed it.
The unicorn was cool, and farted rainbows. :P
5/5.

10. Cold Hands by Cassandra Clare (zombies)
This story was okay.
It was about a girl who was in love with the mayor's son. But then the evil mayor made plans for his son to die, etc etc.
And they lived in a town where people could come back to life after they die and be zombies. But the zombies don't eat brains and stuff, they just wander around the streets.
So, the mayor's son comes back, blah blah blah.
Anyway, it was alright.
3/5.

11. The Third Virgin by Kathleen Duey (unicorns)
I was so not a fan of this story.
What the heck.
Emo unicorns, anyone?
Not for me.
The unicorn just went around, looking for virgins and trying to kill himself. Or something. idk. Not very interesting. :/
1/5.

12. Prom Night by Libba Bray (zombies)
This one was okay.
It was interesting, kept me amused for the whole thing.
3/5.

And yeah.
So, to add up my scores:
Unicorns- 2 + 3 + 1 + 5 + 5 + 1 = 17/30
Zombies- 5 + 2 + 5 + 4 + 3 + 3 = 22/30

So, for me, the zombies win.
I am Team Zombie.
And that's understandable.
Justine L. was such a good team captain, she really convinced me that zombies are better.
And they had some amazing stories and authors.

Maybe another anthology should be written with better unicorn stories.
I still love unicorns, but now, thanks to Justine L, I love zombies a lot more than I did.

It was a really awesome book, and I totally recommend it. Totally. :D

*Hardcore feminists, I mean. The ones that refuse to change their name after marriage. Catherine Deveny wrote an article about it, and pretty much said "you're not a feminist if you change to your partner's name". SCREW YOU, CATHERINE DEVENY. I can be Laura Fasolo-Thomas-McGinty-Langdon-Evans-Overstreet if I want to. F*ck you.

**I didn't imply Justine L. is a hardcore feminist. She just didn't change her name after marriage, okay, I'm not criticising her or anything. I love you, Justine L, and your husband writes the most amazing books. <3.