FANFIC #2874

Author's note: I am kind of bitter about last night's X Factor finale and also Starsky not being in the team tomorrow, so here's a fanfic about me and my bff Mitchell Johnson to ease my pain.

"Stand up something something, turn off the lights, give up and surrender," I sang, sitting on a swing and twisting around on it.
"Please shut up," my bff Mitchie J said quietly. He sat on the other swing, not moving, staring into the distance.
"What's up, Mitchie?" I asked him, "Your problem is no bigger than mine."
"Your problem?" Mitchie asked, looking at me incredulously, "I can't even bowl straight!"
I laughed. "Oh right," I said, agreeing with him, "Fair enough."
"But seriously," Mitchie said, looking at me with kind eyes, "What is getting you down?"
"The Collective lost," I said, glumly, "So did Jason."
"Did you vote?" Mitchie said, accusingly.
"Yes!" I defended, "I actually did, omg. It was just one vote but STILL."
"Sammi Jade is good," Mitchie mused.
"Her winner's single sucked monkey nuts," I said.
Mitchie raised his eyebrows. "And Jason's...?"
"His was GOOD, it was like Love Story," I argued.
"Okay then," Mitchie said, not believing me.

Just then, we heard a branch breaking behind us.
I turned to look.
It was Jacques Kallis.
"Could you not fall on the ground and break a branch off a tree?" I asked him, angrily.
"D'urgggg?" Kallis said.
I stood up.
I got a raspberry pie from my back pocket.
I chucked it.
It only hit Kallis' big toe which only made him angrier.
I winced.

Mitchie jumped up and, darting past me, bowled a cricket ball at Kallis.
Kallis goes, "D'URGGG?" as he stared at the cricket ball.
Then the ball turned into a pie and slapped Kallis right in the face.

I laughed.
Mitchie laughed.
Kallis ran away.

THE END~