What's the time?!
IT'S JOKE TIMEEEE~! (As opposed to Peanut Butter Jelly Time and Hammer Time).
My comments are written in italics.
1. How does a butcher introduce his wifey?
Meat Patty!
2. How do you beat a vampire at poker?
Raise the stakes.
3. What's brown and sticky?
A stick!
My favourite joke, omg. Because you think the answer will be something rude but it's not. :P.
4. A sausage and an egg are frying away in a pan together, when the egg turns to the sausage and says "getting a bit warm in here..." The sausage looks over and says "ARRGH!!! A talking egg!"
Technically, the egg could just be like, "ARRRGH, A TALKIN' SAUSAGE!" because the sausage talked too. But oh well.
5. An Irishman and an Englishman walked into a bar. ...Surely, one of them would've ducked.
6. What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idea.
7. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
Still no idea.
8. If Richmond and Collingwood merged, what would the team be called?
Tiger Woods.
9. Why does E.T. have big wide eyes?
He saw his phone bill.
10. Why was Tigger looking in the toilet?
To find Pooh.
11. Why was Mickey Mouse looking in the telescope?
To find Pluto.
12. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin' Catholic.
13. Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.
14. I put the SEXY in DYSLEXIA. :P.
THE END~!
Post your own jokes, kk. Funny or not, I still wanna read them. ;).
2 comments:
Ha ha those jokes crack me up!
Alright, today I was reading an adults (or so they say) joke book at Big W, and I came across this really funny blonde joke:
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde was drinking in a bar during a time of prohibition. Suddenly they heard a police car outside and ran to the back of the bar, where there was an alley. The brunette jumped into a dumpster, the redhead into a bin, and the blonde- having nowhere else to go- jumped into the potato sack.
The police, hearing noises out the back, went to the alley to check if there was anyone hiding. He kicked the dumpster where the brunette was and the brunette said, "Meow, meow." Thinking there was a cat in the dumpster, the policeman moved on to the bin. Once again he kicked it, and the redhead inside went "Woof, woof." Believing there to be a dog inside the bin, the policeman moved onto the potato sack where the blonde was. He kicked the potato sack and the blonde said, "Potatoes, potatoes."
Ha ha. That cracked me. Even though I've heard it before. Maybe you have too. Still, hope you enjoyed it :)
LOLLL, that's so funny. Hehe. ;).
I haven't heard that one before. I've heard jokes that are similar to it but not that exact one, lol. :D.
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