ZOIDBERG TALES!

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-10T17:44:00.000-08:00

lol, wow. They found a stone in the Chest which allows you to transfer a superpower to someone else. But it only works for Lorien people.
So, John was able to turn invisible.

And then Sam grabs the stone, but nothing happens, so he's like, "Please! I'll only use it for the power of good. No girls' locker rooms."
OMG SAM YOU PERV. lol i love you Sammy. <3.

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-09T02:37:00.000-08:00

Marina's guardian is an asshole.

Henri cared SO MUCH about John's safety, about John surviving, about going back to Lorien even though his wife is probably dead. Henri still wanted to go back there.
And Henri worried about it all, to the point where he never slept, he just stayed up all night, trolling the interwebz, looking for signs of other Loric people.
THIS is how much he cared about John.

And then, the opposite occurs with Number Seven, Marina.
Her guardian does not care about going back to Lorien. At all. She only cares about staying in the convent, being a Sister, praying, and God. And maybe a tiny bit about Marina.

And Marina wants help with her Legacies (super powers), wants to know what's in the Chest (a box containing important secrets about Lorien or something), and wants to find the others to beat the Mogadorians as a team.
But her guardian wants nothing to do with this. Her guardian is a bitch, omg wtf. John was so lucky to have Henri. And even Six had a good guardian, but she died when Six was only 13. So Six has been on her own since then, poor thing. :(

jfc.

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-07T19:47:00.000-08:00

lol wow.
On the planet Lorien, there was a statue of Pittacus Lore.
Does that mean in Forks, there's a statue of Stephenie Meyer?

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-07T01:22:00.000-08:00

So, apparently, the police have labelled John and Henri "international terrorists" and the whole Paradise city is in uproar.

This is bad. Not for John, I'm sure he'll survive. It's bad for Sarah. She'll get interrogated, whether it's by the local police (not so bad) or Mogadorians (so bad that she could die).
If she releases crucial information to John's whereabouts, that's okay. John wouldn't mind, because if she was threatened to give that information, John would prefer she was alive rather than dead. So would I.

Anyway, I hope all is well. Apparently there's another book coming out in August 2012. Ugh. I can't wait that long! Now I'll have to read The Power Of Six as sloooooooooooow as I caaaaaaaaaaaaaan, draaaaaaaaaagging oooooooout eeeeeeeeeeeeeveryyyy wooooooooooooord as if theyyyyyyyy arrrrrrrrrrre veryyyyyy impooooooooooooooortant. :P

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-06T21:46:00.001-08:00

Marina's guardian is a bitch. Holy crap. Marina wants to keep moving, on the run, to get away from the possibility of Mogadorians, you know? And her guardian is like quoting religious things and wanting to stay in the convent.
What.
Um, okay then.
Good luck with that.

THE POWER OF SIX update

2012-02-06T21:11:00.000-08:00

So, I'm reading The Power of Six (sequel to I Am Number Four).

It starts off with Number Seven, checking the interwebz and finding out that John and Henri Smith demolished a whole school on their own (LIES, it was the huge beasts!), killed 5 people (what?), and left nothing as evidence except piles of ash (dead Mogadorians).
And the police are like, "We will find Henri Smith and his son."
UM, LOL DUDES, Henri is like dead, you know. And John is on the run with Six and Sam, and has probably changed his name soooo yeah. Good luck with that. :P

Also, Number Seven (Marina) and her guardian came to Earth the same time as John, yet they were poor and homeless and ended up living in a convent. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. Why did Henri have a shitload of moniez and junk, and Marina's guardian didn't? OMG WHY. :/

Anyhoo, I hope Sarah gets mentioned in this book. I hope Sarah and John live happily ever after and have a child more perfect than Beth. :D

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-03T18:09:00.000-08:00

This is the last I AM NUMBER FOUR update.
Because I finished the book.
It was really good.
But John, Six and Sam had to leave at the end, as they are running from the Mogadorians. So John had to leave Sarah in Paradise, wahhhh. My otp.

Anyway, stay tuned for the next blog posts: either I AM NUMBER FOUR (movie) updates or I AM NUMBER FOUR (sequel) updates. Whatever comes first. I haven't decided yet. /indecisive.

FANFIC #92834034

2012-02-02T22:41:00.000-08:00

I chucked the ball hard, and Wadey caught it with his special blue and green gloves.
Then he threw it back and I caught it in my sequined gloved hands. Hee hee!
"Nice," Wadey said, nodding in approval at my catching.
"Thanks," I said, grinning, "You're good too."
We kept passing the ball back and forth, throwing it harder and harder at each other.
"Are you ready for the game tonight?" I asked.
"Yeah, you bet," Wadey replied, smiling.

Suddenly I heard a sound behind me.
I swivelled around, just as Wadey had thrown the ball. It hit me in the back. "Ow," I cried, rubbing my back and staring at the stranger in Wadey's backyard.
"Who are you?" Wadey asked, also staring at the stranger.
"Virat Kohli," the stranger said, very d'urggggingly, "D'urg."
"YOU CENTURY-MAKING BITCH!" I yelled, fiercely.
"D'urg?" Kohli said.
"Laura, we won anyway," Wadey told me quietly, "Don't worry."
I grabbed a pie from my back pocket and chucked it hard. The blueberry pie went straight into Kohli's face, turning his whole face blue.
"Bam!" I cried, happily, high-fiving Wadey. "My bff has taught me well."
THE END~.

Author's Note: Wadey is the new AUS wicket-keeper. He doesn't throw pies. But I do! :D

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-02T17:22:00.000-08:00

NOOO HENRI, NOOOO!
Excuse me.
Henri just died. ;____;

And now they (John, Sarah/Quinn, Six, Sam, and Mark) are in a hotel. Or something.
Bernie Kosar is alive, you guys! Yay!
And the romance between John and Sarah continue. Aw. So lovely, omg ahsjahswjcfhdjdfhffsoi. <3.

Anyhoo, I'm nearly finished the book. Which should I do first: watch the movie or read the next book? Tough decisions. :/

I AM NUMBER FOUR idea

2012-02-02T03:12:00.001-08:00

Why don't they just find a big truck (like a garbage truck or a huge bulldozer) and when the Mogadorians come, they drive right over the top of them. Or something.

I mean, it worked for Ellie & co in Tomorrow When The War Began. They needed to get an injured Lee out of the town, so Ellie stole a huge truck and drove out. It was invincible to the enemies' bullets. They were safe.

I'm no rocket scientist (I study how chemicals react, not rockets) but this idea seems very flawless. Come on, John, I dare you to comment and explain why my idea wouldn't work. Quit fighting the evil aliens, and come on my blag. Do it. I dare you. Prove me wrong.

Seriously, you guys. In my last blag post, I said 'don't ever give up hope', but what if I have? What if I believe John and Sarah won't survi--- NO! Snap out of it, Laura! Think of Sarah's pretty face and how cute she is! Think of the perfect couple that John and Sarah are! Think! They will survive! They will triumph over the evil aliens! Hope!

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-02T01:52:00.000-08:00

John can talk to animals!

...or communicate with them, at least.
Which just makes his relationship with Sarah/Quinn* even more cuter and romantic. If they don't defeat the Mogadorians and live happily ever after, I will cry so much.
If John dies, and we never hear what happened to Sarah/Quinn, tears will pour down my face.

*Sarah/Quinn went to Colorado for a week with some cheerleaders (Santana, Brit, and Becky) and they helped build shelters and stuff for the animals. :). So, Sarah loves animals and John can communicate with them, so yeah. They make a good team.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-01T22:47:00.000-08:00

Bernie Kosar to save the day!
Yay.
He's a shape-shifting animal, who is native from the planet Lorien, having the ability to change shape into any other animal. He came to Earth with other animals, on a rocket with fuel.

lol wow.
Spoilers?

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-01T20:53:00.000-08:00

John, Six and Henri are still stuck at the school. Eep.
And the beasts and Mogadorians with swords have arrived. Double eep.
Scaryyy.
But John & co haven't given up hope.

"There is always hope. New developments have yet to present themselves. Not all the information is in. Don't give up hope just yet. It's the last thing to go. When you have lost hope, you have lost everything. And when you think all is lost, when all is dire and bleak, there is always hope." -Quoted from the book. Lovely. :D

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-02-01T17:52:00.000-08:00

lol.
They are fighting the Mogadorians.
And John feels someone grab him from behind, so he goes to deflect it and probably throw them into the next county.... until he realises...
It's his girlfriend.
Haha.
It amused me, shaddup. :P

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-31T19:02:00.000-08:00

Ugh.
The evil aliens have found John, so now he will never escape them, never live a normal life with Sarah and have beautiful gifted children, unless he kills all the Mogadorians. FFFFFFFFFFF.
So, I'm up to the scary part.
As if the parts I've already read weren't scary enough.
It's all scary.
I don't want to watch the movie anymore. I'd be sitting there with my eyes closed the whole time saying, "MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!"

Fact about me: I'm a horrible person to take to an action movie. Even during Harry Potter, I get scared. The scene at Godric's Hollow? I was squirming in my seat, my hands covering my eyes. Terrifying. :/

Anyway, Sarah/Quinn will run off to Yale, and Six and John will fight these stupid alien dudes.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-31T16:26:00.000-08:00

I've just got up to the part where Number Six enters the story.
She is described as having "dark hair".
DARK HAIR?
Teresa Palmer has blonde-ish hair in the pictures I've seen?
Huh?
jfc.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-31T02:37:00.000-08:00

John has just told Sarah/Quinn that he's an alien.
It's so romantic, you guys!
I love these two, they are so lovely omg I ship them so hard. :')

I just keep expecting Quinn will burst into singing Never Can Say Goodbye, and I will cry because it will be lovely and romantic and so wonderful.
Whyyy.
Puck and Finn have never been like this, they've never saved Quinn's life. One of them knocked her up, and the other stole her away from her true love, Sammy.
WHY.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-31T00:30:00.000-08:00

Oh no, you guys.
Sam, Sarah/Quinn, and John went to a party at Mark James' house.
And the whole house is now on fire.
And guess what?
Sarah/Quinn is stuck inside.
She's going to be toast if her fire-resistant boyfriend doesn't save her.
Only, she doesn't know her boyfriend is fire-resistant.
Oh god, oh god, oh god.
If my Quinn dies, there'll be nothing to live for.
I will be way more depressed than when Zane died.
Noooo.
Save her, John! Use the forceeeee!

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-30T23:37:00.000-08:00

That's twice that they've mentioned Sarah/Quinn wearing berry lip balm.
I think this is a sign.
A sign... that Faberry is endgame.
True facts.
I don't even ship it (I like Finchel more, mainly because I like Finn) but I accept that it will be endgame.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-30T21:24:00.000-08:00

So, John and Sarah/Quinn are madly in love.
One's an alien (specifically called a Loric) and the other is the most gorgeous girl you will ever meet (Dianna Agron).
I bet the next thing to happen is a mutant alien forming in Sarah/Quinn's stomach.

And according to the book, lots of people have had a Loric parent and a human parent. Einstein, Leonardo Da Vinci, Buddha, Julius Caesar (the boy, not the girl), Isaac Newton, Aristotle, and heaps more.
So, it's not like Bella having a vampire baby, or Vivian having the demon spirit baby.
It's different.
John and Sarah/Quinn could create an exeptional and brilliant person, with so many talents such as fire resistant and switching off lights with the snap of fingers.

And mind you, it wouldn't be Quinn's first baby. Beth won't seem so perfect now, after Sarah/Quinn pops out the next member of MENSA.
And Puck will be like, "WHAAAAT?"
And Quinn will go, "Gee, sorry, I thought you were too busy raw dogging a beehive. :P"
Hahaha.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-30T19:17:00.000-08:00

John Smith, boy on fire. I'm still betting on you.

Oh sorry, let me explain. John just doused himself in gasoline, lit himself on fire, and did some training- in order to be ready when the Mogadorians come.
Did I mention that John is fire resistant? No? Well, he is. :D

John can also move things with his mind. I wish I had that. :P

Also, I love Sam. He said "wicked cool". That's like what I say, except what I say is "mad cool". Same diff.
And and and John goes to Sam, "EAT IT." And all I thought of was the Weird Al cover version of Beat It. EAT IT, JUST EAT IT.
Glee Hee!
<3 MJ.

CRICKET update

2012-01-30T02:02:00.000-08:00

Wadey and Starsky into the AUS One Day squad.
YES!

Poor Twatto, though. He's gotz a calf injury or something. Didak had one of those last year. It takes ages to heal, I think. Although, I'm not a doctor. And god help society if I ever do become one. :/

And Mitchie J! I miss him so much, omg. I'm going to stuff my face with pies.

Anyhoo, I hope Australia dominate the One Day series just like the Tests. And Tendulkar better not make his 100th century. The whole thing is stupid. You can't throw the number of centuries from two different forms of the game together. That would be like saying Glenn McGrath has taken 9283747385 wickets. Okay, let's just say he has. If Tendulkar can do it, why can't we?
Seriously, omg.
If Sri Lanka bowl badly and gift Tendulkar a century on our turf, I will hang Malinga from a passionfruit vine and wait till the cows come home. And I don't even live on a farm so the cows will never come home and Malinga can stick that in his juice box and suck it. jfc.

Anyway, if Tendulkar even THINKS about making a century, he can just forget it. Because it won't happen. Not here, not anywhere. The only place I will allow him to make a century is England, preferably hitting sixes off Swann and Anderson's bowling. Because then I can enjoy it too. Hahahaha. :P
And, when he is on 1, 23, 45, 69, and 99, I want Tendulkar to hit the ball in the air, and Alastair Cook will be the one under it. And Cook has to drop it for those 5 times. :P

My plans are awesome.
Shut up. :D

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-30T00:13:00.000-08:00

Good news: Henri is not dead.
Bad news: He's probably held hostage and John has to go save him.

lol, Sam and John are driving to Athens in Sam's dad's truck. :P
And neither of them has their licence or knows how to drive.
Don't worry, John, driving isn't that difficult. I've had three lessons, and I haven't crashed* the car once!

And John broke Sarah/Quinn's camera. On Thanksgiving. Luckily Black Friday is the day after, so Sarah/Quinn can get a new camera cheaply. Go figure!

*Well, I've only driven in areas where there are no cars- like the factory area near Woop Woop. And one time, I had my blinker on to turn left, and I forgot to brake so I drove right past the street. Oopsies. And then another time I put my foot on the brake because there was a stop sign. And I still haven't got it through my thick head that when you hold down the brake, you have to keep holding it down to stay stationary. I play too many video games, where you hit the brakes once and you're stopped. Damn cars and their rocket science. Jay-sus. Also, I was only driving at 30 k's for most of the lesson. My dad got me to drive at 50 k's once, and I almost shat myself. :/

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-29T02:33:00.000-08:00

Oh god. John, who doesn't know if Henri is dead or alive, just worked out that he can open the chest if Henri dies.
Holy crap man, I'm scared.
What if he opens the chest?
Then Henri is dead.
Meaning that the Mogadorians probably killed him?
Oh no.
I can't keep reading.
Nooooo.
I don't want Henri to die. He reminds me of Haymitch. And I love Haymitch!
;___;

2012-01-29T02:24:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder if there's anyone that reads my blog and is annoyed with my constant I Am Number Four updates.
If you are annoyed, please say so now. I don't mind, okay, and I don't bite. :D

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-28T23:55:00.000-08:00

So Henri has just left to go to Athens and he hasn't come back.
And John & the Hart family have already started eating Thanksgiving dinner.
This is so depressing, what if Henri never returns?
What if John has to live all on his lonesome?
What if John needs to get inside the box- the one with the Legacies or something?
What if it's parent-teacher night at school?
What if the government/police/whatever find out that there's someone under 18 living on their own and John gets sent to the community home?
What if the Mogadorians run the community home and they eat John for breakfast?

Sorry, I'm a little scared.
I don't want Henri to go.
I imagine him to be like Haymitch, and look like Woody Harrelson. Except maybe without the drinking. I think.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-28T20:57:00.000-08:00

Sarah/Quinn has just invited John over for Thanksgiving, to have dinner with her and her parents.

Is there any chance that John will burst into, "YOU'RE HAVING MY BABY~ WHAT A LOVELY WAY OF SAYING HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME."
Is there? Is there???!

Or maybe John can reveal his secret through song. He could sing somethingt like, "I'M AN ALIEN". idk idk are there any songs that have those lyrics? Whatev.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-28T18:22:00.001-08:00

lol, the Sam kid thinks that his father was abducted by aliens because "he just went somewhere and never came back".

Um wow, okay, did you ever think it would be a drug overdose? I have watched so much Glee, I know everything okay. I wish I could meet this Sam dude, slap his face, and yell, "THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS ALIENS!"
Because there isn't.
It's silly.
Everyone should stop talking about them, because they aren't real and you're all silly. jfc.

Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to steal Daisy Thomas, jump into my unidentified flying object, and head back to my home planet. Bye!

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-28T03:53:00.000-08:00

So many times I've read sections of the book and think, "This better happen in the movie!"
Because yes, after I read the book, I'm watching the movie.
I don't know why I never saw it when it was at the cinemas. Expensive, maybe? Me being all cheapskate-y. :/
Anyway, the further I read into the book, the more I want to see the movie. IT'S SO GOOD.
Also I saw some pictures from le movie.
Here are my favourites:

Sam Goode, being all cutesy and awesome. :)

Sarah/Quinn, gorgeous outfit. So cute.

Sarah/Quinn, with her camera. <3

John showing Sarah/Quinn his glowing hands. I want those glowing hands, omg.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-28T01:06:00.000-08:00

I wonder how they do the glowing from John's hands in the movie.
It seems cool.
I wish my hands would glow like that.
I wish I could be resistant to fire.
Fire is one of my worst phobias, I am terrified.

First thing I'd do with fire resistance is go on Masterchef. I'd write on the application "resistant to fire". They'd be like, "WHAT OMG HOWWWW" and they'd have to invite for an audition-y thing. I'd cook a meal, removing things from the oven with my bare hands, touching the stove.
And then, they'd have to let me on the show.
I'd be the coolest contestant everrrr, and people would call me "Laura: girl on fire" and the ratings would be off the charts.

LOLLLL shut up I kind of want to go on Masterchef. Leave me alone. They meet all those cool chefs and eat lots of food and go to awesome and expensive restaurants. :P

And I'm afraid of the dark too, so the glowing of my hands would be handy. GEDDIT, HANDY. Omg, go me. Punny.
I could read books late at night, without having to turn my bedroom light on. Omg wow.
I wonder how Alex Pettyfer did it.
I need to ask him.
Or Dianna.

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-27T21:40:00.000-08:00

John went to a Halloween festival, where they have different floats. Not all floats are scary or Halloween-y, there's the float carrying the high school footallers throwing out candy to the children and another float with high school cheerleaders.
Also the mayor rides in a red convertible and throws candy to the children. :P

And then Sarah/Quinn walks alongside the cheerleaders' float and takes pictures. She waves and smiles at John. Cute!

Of course, as I read this, I'm listening to Human Nature, sung by Sam and Mercedes. FFFFFFF. :/

I AM NUMBER FOUR update

2012-01-27T18:28:00.000-08:00

So, John and Sarah/Quinn are in the same Home Ec class.
They made blueberry cupcakes.
I was waiting for Sarah/Quinn to be like, "Once I got hit with a blueberry slushie, and looked like a creature out of Avatar down there" but sadly no. :P

Chapter 10 of I Am Number Four

2012-01-27T03:04:00.000-08:00

So, the big quarterback guy (Mark) stole John's mobile phone.
But then Mark's ex-girlfriend (Quinn*) managed to get it back for John. And she put her name and number into the phone. :P

Here's what I think happened:
Mark put the phone in his locker, and had no plans to give it back.
Quinn broke into the locker.
I bet anything, that she got into the locker because she's handy with a nail file.
And no, I didn't get all this from Glee**.
Oh and she put her number into John's phone because she loves him. There must be some kind of romance about to happen. I hope so. I hope John dates her. I'm sure he will, I don't think anyone could refuse the chance of dating Quinn/Dianna Agron. Except maybe to raw dog a beehive. :D

*Sarah, but I think of her as Quinn. Shut up.

**Or did I?

I AM NUMBER FOUR...

2012-01-26T01:39:00.000-08:00

...Is what I'm reading at the moment.
I haven't seen the film but I do love Dianna Agron because she's stunning and gorgeous and everything that I'm not. Same with the whole Glee cast.

Anyway, I'm only up to chapter 5 in the book, but it's so good.
The main character (John) just moved to Ohio (that's where McKinley High is!). And when he thinks of Ohio, he thinks of "cows and corn and nice people". And on the license plates in Ohio, it says "The Heart Of It All".
Yes, okay, I like reading things about Ohio. Shut up. I'm obsessed with Glee, and everything related to it.

Anyhoo, John reaches Ohio, and goes to school. (The city is called Paradise, not Lima. Damn.)
And he meets a girl (Sarah, but I shall call her Quinn) who is very friendly and likes taking photos. John thinks that Quinn is the prettiest girl he's ever seen (duh!) and is in awe of her (like me!). Quinn used to be a cheerleader and dated the quarterback (like Glee!) but when she quit the cheerleading group (preggerz maybe?), she dumped her boyfriend.
Oh and the new kid, John, goes to his first class and it's Astronomy. Guess who's in the class? Quinn! Reminds me so much of Fabrevans, hahahaha.

Yeah, I was reading it at the races in Kyneton. While drinking a blue slushie. Moarrr Fabrevans references!
Sam and Quinn's first conversation was after Sam got slushied, and Quinn said that once she had been hit with a blueberry slushie and she looked like a creature out of Avatar. :D

And then I betted on some horse called Bullseye Wade. I didn't realise it was 9 years old when I chose it. Oops.
It came last. :(
But yeah. I chose it because it reminded me of the lovely Matthew Wade who will replace Bad Haddin some day. SOME DAY. Mark my words, my little Wadey will be ready to rumble when the next Ashes rolls around. :P

And yeah.
The Aussies are doing well in the cricket.
I didn't watch it today, but Siddle got a five-faaaa (Victorians ftw~!) and they bowled out India for under 300.
But unfortunately one Indian (Kohli) got a century. The first century for an Indian player this series. Wow.
And yay Pup! I like how he respects his bowlers and doesn't choose to send India into bat again. That's so nice. :D
Also, Dave Warner did okay in the 2nd innings, making about 28. Cowan did alright too, but it's Marsh that's letting the team down. He got a duck. Again. jfc, he's working so hard for that Jack Shite Medal. I reckon he's got it in the bag, now that Haddin has proved he can bat*.

And yeah.
I listened to some of the Hottest 100 on Triple J.
I picked Gotye for number 1, so GO ME. (Even though everyone else would've done the same, hahaha whatever).
I also picked some Wombats songs in my Top 10 (heaps of them) and I know some Wombats songs made the list. YAY.
Also, Shake It Out by Florence and the Machine got #13, I think. :D
And I picked Lisa Mitchell's song for my Top 10, but I don't know if it was on there. Matt Corby's song got number 3, so that's pretty good for a ex-Australian Idol person. Or maybe that one fan** was voting over and over again. Who knows?

*And by "bat", I mean making a decent score against some not-so-good bowling and not very well-placed fielders. Bravo, Haddin. Good luck making that score against Sri Lanka, or even England.

**It was probably Marcia Hines or one of the other judges. Kyle, maybe? Dicko? Mark Holden? idk idk, whatever, they probably think that if an Aus Idol contestant made it in the Top 10, then Aus Idol may come back and they will get their jobs back. :P. Oh wait, Kyle got sacked, didn't he? Well, the other three will get their jobs back. Hahaha.

21

2012-01-23T02:38:00.000-08:00

So, what's the deal with 21st's anyway?
Why is the age 21 so important?
It's just another number. Why not celebrate 22 or 43? What's the big deal anyway?

Anyway, it's my 21st coming up*.
And I have to celebrate it in some way**.
Some ideas:

Restaurant. Breadstix? Nah, too far. A local one? Mayhaps. Taco Bell? OMG KAREN YOU'RE SO STUPID I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET.
Murder mystery party. My mum's idea. I'd come as Sherlock, of course. Or I'd be Watson and just sit there saying, "F*CK YOU, I WON A BAFTA." Hahaha omg wut.
Picnic at le horsey races. Also my mum's idea. I'm not a big fan of horses, unless they are on a shirt as a carousel. I spend way too much time watching Glee, hahaha wut.
Party at the Murder House. With an added serving of Tate!
A party like the one Rachel Berry had on Glee. There will be red solo cups, drunkenness, spin the bottle, and me dueting with Blaine. Yay!

Fun!
Yeah okay, I'm bored. :P
Deal with it.
All you stalkers can come. You're so skilled at stalking, I don't even have to tell where I'm having my 21st. :D

*March 6th, for those of you that care. Not that anyone reads this. Still. A present would be nice. I live at 221B Baker St. Send some flowers and Daisy Thomas. kthx.

**Unfortunately, sitting in my room eating ice-cream isn't celebrating. :(

2012-01-21T00:04:00.000-08:00

Mitchie J and Bad Haddin.
Another fanfic, presented as a comic.
Enjoy!

FANFIC #8329899

2012-01-19T22:50:00.000-08:00

"Alright, I'm ready," I called, standing in the crease and glancing up at Starsky. He came at me, menacingly, and I watched his left arm came around and the ball came straight towards me...
I swung, and completely missed.
"Fffffff," I said, careful to watch my language as there were children in the park.
The stumps went flying as the ball smashed into them.
"Aw, Starsky, don't be so mean," I whimpered.
"That's just how I bowl," he said, with a shrug.
"Can't you be like the other Mitchie?" I whined, "I miss that Mitchie."
Starsky grinned. "But I'm here now!" he said, his eyebrows dancing, "I'm in the Test team! We can do fun things too."
"Okay," I agreed, "Umm, let's..."
And then suddenly, we were ambushed by a short man.
"I WANT MY CENTURY," the man yelled, d'urggggingly. "AND I WANT IT NOW."
"No!" I cried, fiercely.
I felt around in my back pocket for a pie. There was none. Crap.
"It's alright, Laura!" Starsky called.
I turned around to him. He was standing there, holding a raspberry pie.
"Throw it!" I yelled excitedly.
"D'urg?" Tendulkar said.
Starsky chucked the pie, and it flew through the air. The pie hit Tendulkar in the knee, and splattered on his left leg. He ran off crying.
"Terrible shot," I told Starsky, shaking my head, "You really need to practise."
Starsky shrugged. "I'm not as skilled as your bff," he said.
"Whatev," I said, and then smiled. "Let's go eat cheesecakes!"

Author's Note: Starsky is my new bff. His name is Mitchell Starc, and he's a fast left-arm bowler. But he doesn't bowl pies. :/
Anyway, Mitchie J hasn't been replaced in my fanfics. I still love Mitchie J, but I've kind of forgotten about him. Sorry Mitchie J, I will make it up to you. :D
Enjoy!

AHS FINALE

2012-01-17T15:03:00.001-08:00

lol wow. The American Horror Story finale was AMAZING.
It may be a messed up and crazy show, but it's awesome. :D

The way that the Harmon family & co kicked the other family out of the house was so good. :P
It was crazy.
I felt bad for Tate, he was so sad. But I don't really ship Violate. I mean, they are cute together and all, but I think Violet (unlike me) is smart not to fall for Tate's good looks and be swayed by his charm.

And Constance was so awesome. How she managed to end up with the antichrist baby, and how he turned into a mini Tate. :P. When she blamed something on Violet, I nearly stabbed something, but she will be a good mother. I guess.

I can't believe it's produced by Ryan Murphy.
Hey Ryan Murphy, how'd you manage to produce something as amazing as American Horror Story, and at the same time, cough up a whole lot of shit and call it "Glee"?
Yes, I love Glee, but I'm allowed to criticise it, okay. It's shit, I know it, you know it, but I'm addicted. It's like my own personal brand of heroin. :/

Anyway, I can't wait for Season 2. I think Jessica Lange has signed on for the next season (she won a Golden Globe, so I guess RM couldn't risk losing her) and I hope Evan Peters does too.
I hope it's just as good as Season 1, but judging by Glee and how that is going, I shouldn't get my hopes up. :P

Anyway, bye.

WACA TEST MATCH.

2012-01-14T22:26:00.000-08:00

So, the Aussies win another Test meaning they have won the series.
India just couldn't hang on to make Australia bat again, even though Bad Haddin was doing everything he could to help them. :P

Anyway, the next Test is on the 24th January.
In Adelaide.
I think the team will just be left as it is.
Unless someone gets an injury, what's the point?
Cowan and Warner have proved useful openers, Marsh is so-so, we know that Clarke, Ponting and Huss can bat (from the SCG Test) and Bad Haddin is Pup's bff.
The only problem is Lyon. Does he fit in the team?
I say yes.
But I love Starsky (Mitchie S).

Oh well.
I think, because this next Test doesn't really matter, they should put Wade in. And maybe Dan Christian instead of Marsh.
Just to see how they go.
Just a little test, to see if they can handle a Test match.
To compare them to the players that they replaced.
And if we lose? So what, we still keep the trophy and we will know that Wade and Christian aren't ready for Test cricket.
And if we win? Then we know that Wade and Christian are somewhat ready depending on how they play.

The Ashes is in 2013.
It feels like a long way off, but this upcoming Test is a good way to test out several debutants.
I hope the selectors see it from my point of view.
I don't care if India win in Adelaide. Good for them. They have played somewhat well, they deserve a win.
With T-Pain injured, they need to try out another Bad Haddin replacement. Matthew Wade.

Whatev.
The new Glee episode, Yes/No airs on Wednesday in Australia, and I am so excited for it, I could wet my pants. Samcedes cuteness, Summer Nights, synchronised swimming, three proposals, one couple eloping, your face, Sam's shirtlessness, Sam, Damian, Sam, Sam, Sam.
Bye.

AMERICAN HORROR STORY - The episode with medical scenes and horrorrrrrrr.

2012-01-10T03:56:00.000-08:00

lol wow.
Spoiler alert: Everyone dies.

Tate climbed out of Violet's bed the same way that he climbed in. This amuses me greatly, omg.
I can't believe Violet yelled at Tate to go away.
Look princess, Tate was your everything. Get off your high horse. He may have killed people, but you killed yourself. You are the reason your parents stayed so long in the murder house, because you wanted to be there. You caused them grief and worry. Freaking hell, stop being so high and mighty.

End rant.

But yeah, the episode was pretty good.
No idea what happened to the babies, Constance took one of them and I have no idea, wut. Did the smaller one die? Why can't they just tell us?
And at the end of the episode, Eleven didn't even tell us that the next episode would be on next week. They usually do. And this week they didn't. What the heck. Omg, do not tell me that there's no AHS next week. Omg, I might die. Omg, where's my Tate? I'm not dying without my Tate. Hell to the no.

Oh great, I just found out that for Season 2, no characters from Season 1 will be there.
Shit.
No Tate?
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
Omg no.
This is not happening.
Wahhhh.

Rant-y mood today.
Sorry*.

*Not sorry at all.

ZOMBIES VS UNICORNS.

2012-01-07T00:08:00.000-08:00

So, I just finished reading Zombies vs Unicorns. It is an anthology of short stories, with different authors writing either a zombie or unicorn story.

I just want to say: Before I read the book, I was not really Team Unicorn or Team Zombie. But I kind of liked unicorns so yeah.
But the team captain for unicorns, Holly Black, didn't really convince me that unicorns were better.

It was Justine L. (whose surname I can't spell because it's way too long; why she didn't use "Westerfeld" I will never know, omg, feminists* amirite?**) who convinced me that zombies were way cool and I should totally switch to their side. She makes a good argument. I loved her descriptions before each story. <3.

I will now comment on each story. I will try not to spoil them too much. I will give the stories a rating out of 5. :P

1. The Highest Justice by Garth Nix (unicorns)
This was kind of weird, just a princess who was mad at her father or something. Didn't really yell "UNICORNS ARE THE GREATEST" to me. It was meh.
2/5.

2. Love Will Tear Us Apart by Alaya Dawn Johnson (zombies)
Now, this story was good.
It was about a zombie-type guy who was in love with this boy. (Gay love!)
Written so well, and now I want to read the author's novel, Moonshine.
Loved the title, but it reminded me of The Wombats and only a bit of Joy Division. Haha. :P
And the zombie dude liked the boy because he smelt like macaroni and cheese. And they had similar taste in music.
But the boy's dad was an ex-cop or something. And the dad was forcing his son to defeat zombies and evil monsters.
5/5.

3. Purity Test by Naomi Novak (unicorns)
Again, this unicorn story didn't really rock my world.
It was about a unicorn who was wandering the streets of New York, and found a hungover girl lying on a park bench. Then the unicorn asked the girl for help, and they went to some evil wizard's house (no, not Voldemort!) and it was all weird and shit.
It had some amusing things though, like how they got the troll guy to sleep. :P
3/5.

4. Bougainvillea by Carrie Ryan (zombies)
This was kind of weird, it was about a girl who lived on an island with several adults. And her dad was the leader.
I didn't find it very interesting, except when the pirate/zombie came to rescue the girl and said that her dad was a terrible ruler. I cried a little, and thought he was so romantic, like the hero who saves the damsel in distress.
lol yeah. It was okay.
2/5.

5. A Thousand Flowers by Margo Lanagan (unicorns)
This started off really well, with the guy looking for somewhere to pee. And he came across a unicorn, then found a girl lying in the grass.
And then some police-y people came, and arrested the guy, accusing him of something he didn't do.
But he was set free after a trial, and sent home.
Then they found out the girl was pregnant, so the police-y people visited the guy and killed him.
And then, it got weird.
So weird, that I barely understood it. :/
1/5.

6. The Children of the Revolution by Maureen Johnson (zombies)
This story was SO BRILLIANT.
It was freaky and crazy and so amazing.
A girl from America had gone to England to work for these farm people because her then-boyfriend had told her to. She hated the farm work, so this Angelina Jolie-esque woman offered for the girl to baby-sit some children.
The girl accepted (anything to get out of picking blackberries with little pay), and the actress gave the girl so much pay, comfy bed, all-she-could-eat food, and all she had to do with the children was put their food on a conveyor belt when it was feeding time.
It was too good to be true. The girl knew something was suss but couldn't figure it out.
So, at around midnight, the girl checked on the children to make sure they were okay.
The children were pressed up against the fence of their enclosure.
The girl was worried, as it's midnight and the children should be in bed.
So she thought "maybe they need a hug". So... she opened the gate to comfort these poor kids.
The kids ran straight to her and start to bite her.
The girl was like, "holy crap", and quickly got the hell out.
(Sorry for the spoilers).
Anyway, it was really good. :D
5/5.

7. The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn by Diana Peterfreund (unicorns)
This story was also really good.
It was about a girl with really religious parents. And they lived in a town that had just been victim to killer unicorn attacks. And this girl, her cousins were killed by the unicorn.
Anyway, this girl and her friends go to a fair. And there's a unicorn exhibit.
Blah blah, the unicorn is preggerz, and it gives birth, blah blah, the owner tries to drown the baby, but the girl quickly saves it and takes it home to care for it in her garage.
The unicorn, under the girl's care, gets bigger and bigger, and the girl feels guiltier and guiltier because she's raising a weapon that could kill the entire town (or something).
It's so good.
Read it for yourself.
Amazing. :D
5/5.

8. Inoculata by Scott Westerfeld (zombies)
This story was pretty good, but not as good as the previous two.
I loved the main girl (Ally) had a crush on another girl. (Gay love!)
And then the four kids all ran away together from the adults, hahahaha.
Sorry for the spoiler.
Oops.
But the girl that Ally had a crush on liked one of the boys. :(.
Whatev.
4/5.

9. Princess Prettypants by Meg Cabot (unicorns)
This story was amazing.
I loved it.
So well written and interesting.
Not going to go into detail, but I totally enjoyed it.
The unicorn was cool, and farted rainbows. :P
5/5.

10. Cold Hands by Cassandra Clare (zombies)
This story was okay.
It was about a girl who was in love with the mayor's son. But then the evil mayor made plans for his son to die, etc etc.
And they lived in a town where people could come back to life after they die and be zombies. But the zombies don't eat brains and stuff, they just wander around the streets.
So, the mayor's son comes back, blah blah blah.
Anyway, it was alright.
3/5.

11. The Third Virgin by Kathleen Duey (unicorns)
I was so not a fan of this story.
What the heck.
Emo unicorns, anyone?
Not for me.
The unicorn just went around, looking for virgins and trying to kill himself. Or something. idk. Not very interesting. :/
1/5.

12. Prom Night by Libba Bray (zombies)
This one was okay.
It was interesting, kept me amused for the whole thing.
3/5.

And yeah.
So, to add up my scores:
Unicorns- 2 + 3 + 1 + 5 + 5 + 1 = 17/30
Zombies- 5 + 2 + 5 + 4 + 3 + 3 = 22/30

So, for me, the zombies win.
I am Team Zombie.
And that's understandable.
Justine L. was such a good team captain, she really convinced me that zombies are better.
And they had some amazing stories and authors.

Maybe another anthology should be written with better unicorn stories.
I still love unicorns, but now, thanks to Justine L, I love zombies a lot more than I did.

It was a really awesome book, and I totally recommend it. Totally. :D

*Hardcore feminists, I mean. The ones that refuse to change their name after marriage. Catherine Deveny wrote an article about it, and pretty much said "you're not a feminist if you change to your partner's name". SCREW YOU, CATHERINE DEVENY. I can be Laura Fasolo-Thomas-McGinty-Langdon-Evans-Overstreet if I want to. F*ck you.

**I didn't imply Justine L. is a hardcore feminist. She just didn't change her name after marriage, okay, I'm not criticising her or anything. I love you, Justine L, and your husband writes the most amazing books. <3.

CRICKET STUFF.

2012-01-05T23:52:00.001-08:00

Yay, Aussies won the SCG Test!
Hilfy got a five-faaaa.
The Vic-quicks got 3 wickets between them. (Probably could've had more, but the 'keeper was kind of sleeping or something. idk.)

Anyway, I just thought I'd blag about it. Because I can.

Also, next Test is at the WACA.
It's time we brought out the big guns. And by that, I mean the W's.
Wade.
Watson.
Wonderful.
Upside down Mitchie J.

Bad Haddin is a joke.
He nearly mucked up the Tendulkar wicket. Luckily Huss was paying attention.
The amount of leg byes was ridiculous. At one stage, the ball just went right past him and he just let it go past. jfc.
I think Wade would do a much better job.
And I'm not just saying that because I'm a bias Victorian. (or am I?)

Twatto is apparently fit to play now.
They can't leave a fit Twatto out of the team.
What did Marsh and Warner do? Besides taking a few catches in the field (Warner's were spectacular, btw~), nothing.
Plus, Huss 'bowling a few' is not ideal. Frankly, I'm sick of it. (Although, I love and adore Huss. Nothing against Huss, it's just his bowling is so-so.)

Upside down Mitchie J is a W.
And yeah yeah, his foot is probably not healed.
But come on, I miss him.
I can't go the whole summer without seeing his pretty face. The KFC ads aren't filling the large hole. I still miss him. Sulk. ;____;

And bye.

FANFIC #829375

2012-01-05T01:50:00.000-08:00

FANFIC
"Check mate," I said, placing my pawn diagonally from the king and smirking.
Mitchie lifted his king and batted my pawn out of the way. "Nope," he said, grinning at me.
"Shit," I murmured, frowning. I kept doing that, I'm so stupid at this game. "Can't we do something else?" I whined.
It was Mitchie's turn to frown. "Like what?"
"Like..." I said, looking around, "Go for a walk?"
"You know I can't," Mitchie said, sadly, "My foot needs to heal."

We sat there for a few minutes in silence.
"Alright," Mitchie said, sighing, "I'll put my moonboot on, okay? We can sit at the park."
"Yay!" I squealed.

At the park, we sat at a picnic bench sitting opposite each other. It was sunny, Mitchie propped his feet up, and I was slurping my raspberry and coke slurpee.
"Sooo..." I said, "How's the cricket going?"
"Umm..." Mitchie said, uneasily.
"Oh right, the foot," I said, facepalming myself for forgetting.
"How's uni?" Mitchie asked.
"Meh," I said, shrugging, "It's alright."
"Cool," he said.
"Mm," I agreed.

Just then, Mitchie let out a gasp.
I spluttered and raspberry sprayed everywhere. "What?" I yelled.
Mitchie pointed behind me.
I turned.
A man stood there, as evil as the evillest thing on Earth.
"Gambhir!" I exclaimed, standing up, "Not you!"
He laughed evilly.
I put my slurpee down, and whipped out a custard and apple pie from my back pocket.
"Nooo!" Gambhir yelled. D'urgggg.
"Yesss!" I said, getting ready to throw.
I chucked it, a hopeless throw. I was losing my technique. The pie whizzed right past Gambhir's leg, and into the outstretching arms of Bad Haddin, who was lurking behind. The pie hit Haddin's gloves, splattered them, and skidded right off to land at his feet.

Then Mitchie screamed, "Don't worry Laura, I'm on it!"
He got out a pie, just a Four n' Twenty, from his pocket.
With the best pie-throwing technique that this country has ever seen, Mitchie whipped the pie into Gambhir's face.

I high-fived Mitchie and we grinned at each other.
Another good day!
THE END~.

Author's note: Gambhir is an Indian player, who I feel like using in this story. He made about 60-something runs today when he was only meant to make 0. :/
Also, Mitchie is Mitchell Johnson. He's my bff, I call him Mitchie. :P
Oh and Bad Haddin can't catch. Not even pies. He's so close to winning the Jack Shite Medal. The previous winner, Marcus North, won't be happy if he doesn't win but sorry North, you might be beaten. So sorry.
Also, Marsh may get the medal too. It could be a joint winner.
Speaking of medals, JPattz wins the one for Most Entertaining Appeals. They are super good. Bravo to you, JPattz. <3.

CRICKET, PINK TEST, DAY 1

2012-01-03T01:30:00.000-08:00

Siddle got his 100th Test wicket.

The Victorians cleaned up the Indian top order.

Marsh continued to show why Khawaja should still be in the team.

Ponting and Clarke clean up the mess that their openers made.

Fun times.
13 wickets fell in a day. This Test will be over in no time. Day 3 is Jane McGrath Day, but they should just swap it to Day 2 so that it still happens.

It was nice to see Mitchie J though. Even if it was on a KFC ad. I'm sure his foot is healing well, and he will easily get back into the team. There's only three fast bowlers so surely they will need a rest, right?

I miss Twatto.
Send Warner back to help his Sydney Thunder team, and make Twatto open with Ed Cowan.
And maybe Twatto could bowl a few overs (like what Huss does, except better).
I hate watching Huss bowl, even though he's one of my favourite players.
I mainly just hate it because I hate seeing Huss get smacked around too much.
It sucks.
Whatev.

I'm done.
Predictions for tomorrow: Ponting makes 60 and goes out; Pup to make a century; Huss to also make a century; Bad Haddin makes a half century and then, as the crowd is absolutely shocked at the possibility of him making runs, he reveals that he is actually Daisy Thomas; J-Pat and Siddle add 200 runs to the total.

Bye.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2011-12-31T17:14:00.000-08:00

Yay.

I went to a New Year's Eve party and I feel like blagging about it.
It was pretty cool.
I barely knew anyone that was there, lol. :P

Someone brought a mini Heineken keg, which was so cute, hahaha.
And then, there was a fruit platter (with pineapple, mangoes, grapes, etc etc) and I think beer from the keg was spilled all over the fruit.
So, pretty much, I ate beer-flavoured pineapple. Which actually tasted quite nice, okay. Whatever. :P

And then, someone had a polaroid camera, so they took some cool photos with that.
That was awesome, but when the photo came out, the picture didn't form when you shook it. It really made no difference to the picture formation whether you shook it or not. :/
Anyway, all that aside, I wantz a polaroid camera.

La la la.
It was a good night.
Everyone was like drinking and seemed tipsy (but maybe it was another year ending that made everyone so hyper) and I'm just like sipping my blood-orange-y soft drink and being all loser-y.

Fun.
I gotz three of those glowstick things, wheeeeeee.
They were still glowing when I got home, so when I had to get to sleep with my room lit up like a carousel.
Well, maybe not that much, but you know whatever. :P

And yay, it's 2012.
I hope the world doesn't end on 12/12/12 or whenever the Mayans predicted it would.

I haven't thought of any good New Year's Resolutions yet. I really should get on to that, haha. :P

2011-12-27T23:13:00.000-08:00

I was so close with my Day 3 predictions, you guys.

I said Sharma would make 10, but he made 11. Close enough, right?
J-Pat didn't get many wickets, but the Indian middle order did collapse sooo...
Warner didn't make a century, but Huss NEARLY did (and is still going). And yes, the rest of them failed with the bat, except Ponting and J-Pat. :P

I should do these prediction things more often.

Okay, for Day 4, I predict:
Huss to make century.
Tendulkar to get run over by a Segway.
J-Pat will make 29.
Hilfy will get around 35.
The Indians will collapse, leaving Ishant Sharma to get all the heap of runs that they so desperately need. (He doesn't, of course, but you know, whatever).
Alex Keath will get 4 catches in the field, maybe 5.

There.
Done.
If these don't happen, I will eat my shorts. :P

CRICKET: Day 2 of Boxing Day Test

2011-12-27T00:51:00.000-08:00

So, after an alright-ish batting performance from the Aussies on Day 1, it was time for Day 2 which pretty much consisted of the Sehwag and Tendulkar smashing boundaries like there's no tomorrow.

Go the Victorians! Siddle with one wicket, plus a wicket on a no-ball. J-Pat with another wicket. And then, cute little Alex Keath as a sub fielder.

And Tendulkar won't make his 100th century this innings. Phew. Only about 7 innings left, plus the one-dayers. And then he will be out of our country, and free to get his stupid century on someone else's home turf.

Fun.

I miss Mitchie J. Damn foot injuries. Who knew that those tiny things on the bottom of our legs could be so cruel?
They need Mitchie in the team. Someone to bowl the perfect line and leng--- oh forget it, I'm just going to munch on this custard pie.

And anyway, who said the bowlers in the current XI are terrible?
I think they are good. Most of them are quite young, but still.

And it sucks that ol' man Huss got out when he didn't really get out. Not fair. Bring back the review system. Who decides that the review system shouldn't be used? :/

Also, I wantz Twatto back. Sulk.

Anyhoo, my predictions for tomorrow: Sharma will make 10 and be bowled by Huss, then J-Pat will get the rest of the wickets. idk, whatever. Then Aussies will come in to bat, and Warner will make a century, so will Huss, and everyone else will fail. Except for Siddle and J-Pat, who add an extra 200 runs to the total.
The end~.

Just another of my great ideas!

2011-12-18T20:47:00.000-08:00

They should make an American Horror Story episode that is about Christmas.
Like, an obligatory Christmas special that all shows seem to be doing, y'know.

Christmas is a happy time, all joyful and stuff, but not in AHS.
It could be like Scary Christmas.
And all the characters can bring something, and they all go to the Murder House to have a lovely Christmas dinner.

And Constance can cook the turkey and stuff in her kitchen. :D
Plus, Tate can bring the potatoes. Well, his name is Tate and all. It's very fitting.
Violet can get some flowers, some purple ones if she must. :P
The gay dude (Zachary Quinto?) can bring the roast pumpkins. Wow, this is working out better than I thought!
Moira, the slutty maid, can clean the place, making sure it's all clean and stuff before the guests arrive.
Cam from Modern Family can come back from the dead (zombie!) and bring a nice ham.

I want to write that Adelaide can bring some water, but that's just horribly cruel, and water is water, no matter what state it is from. Taking an easy dig at South Australia's water supply is cheap and nasty, and I shouldn't do it. I'm sorry. :P

I have no clue what Ben and Vivian can do. I suppose they are hosting this thing so they can sit back and relax, and try not to be spooked out by every little thing.

Also, I'd like Hayden to come, but god only knows what she can bring. Maybe some unicorn blood. That would be nice.

Plus, the policeman dude, whatever his name is. He is awesome, of course he can come. I seem to be organising this, so I choose the guests?

Oh and Larry! The terminal cancer brain dude, whatever. He can bring.... a bowl of brains. Mainly for Vivian, but I'm sure the others can have a bite too.

Wow.
This Christmas party is turning out to be fabulous.
I wish I could come.
Really, I do.
I'd make a good guest, okay.

Now, to make this party into something scary, maybe the turkey could be alive or something. And as they sit down to eat, a duck jumps out, and then a chicken jumps out of that. It's a barnyard in a bang! Turducken!

Okay, okay, maybe not.
Maybe Violet could just start bleeding everywhere from one of her cuts and then they all drown.
Whatever.

And they can all do Kris Kringle/Secret Santa.
Tate will bring a present for Violet, some gay porn magazines. But they end up with Ben, who licks his lips and quietly heads upstairs to a quiet room.
Hayden brings a present for Ben, some contraception or something. But Ben is too busy in a quiet room, so it goes to Violet. She grins happily.
Constance will bring a present for Tate, like a toy fire-truck or something, because he's her special little boy. But it ends up with Larry, who uses it to put out the fire that he created in the basement.
Vivian brings a present for Violet, something fun and happy like a funny picture book to lighten her mood. But this ends up with Cam, who takes it home to read to his lovely daughter, Lily.
Moira brings a present for whoever, a free ticket for a BJ. It ends up with Constance, who is a little confused at first, but says 'what the heck' and starts doing Larry.

That's all that I can bothered with.
I hope Ryan Murphy reads this and enjoys my ideas. I'm sure he will. They are lovely ideas. :P

DAVE WARNER. :D

2011-12-18T17:42:00.000-08:00

One of the greatest people you may ever meet:
Dave Warner, rocking up to meet some teammates, wearing a mad cool rockstar clothes. :P
(Of course, due to keeping this blog G-rated, I'm not putting the picture of the T-shirt on here, but if you wish to view it, you may.)
(Although, the T-shirt isn't that bad, and the beer that she's drinking could just be a coke or something. Who knows? Maybe she fills up beer bottles with mineral water and likes to tan her body? Nothing wrong with that.)

Anyway, jokes aside, this has been a Dave Warner Appreciation Post. Keep up the awesomeness, Warner, and smash some Indians out of the park next Monday! :P

Fun.

DAISY'S BIG SHAVE

2011-12-14T19:46:00.001-08:00

Today, I went to see Daisy Thomas shave off all his hair.
It was exciting.

At the start, some guy showed us around the Westpac Centre (Collingwood's training centre thingy). We saw the gym, the pool, and yeah.
This is my favourite picture:

It reminded me of Kurt and Blaine from Glee. I was so happy when I saw it, I just had to take a photo. Everyone probably thought I was nuts. Which I am. :/

Daisy is so adorable. Two girls did the shaving, because their dad had the highest bid on some thing, idk. Also, in the photos, there is the back of someone's head. Just ignore it. I could crop it out, but you know, whatever.

This is at the start of the shave:

This is halfway through the shave:
He has some hair sticking up, like a rooster, and some of it shaved. :P

This is a side-on view of the wonderful Daisy:
It looks like he has a mohawk.
It's funny.
Maybe he should have kept the mohawk. It would've been cool.

And this, ladies and gentleman, is the new Daisy.
He still looks cute. :D
He doesn't look too bad, though. It may take some time getting used to, but I do like it.

Anyway, Ben Reid and Tyson Goldsack were there, too.
I had a photo with each of them. It was awesome.
I think Reidy and Goldsack were the only players there. Besides Daisy.
(When we were in the reception room thingy, I think we saw N.Bucks. But he was going through a door and I only saw his back.)

And then, I gotz some of Daisy's hair. I will keep it forever and ever. :P
I didn't get that much hair, though. One woman got, like, a whole bunch of it. And she said she would give some to her grandchildren or something, lol.

And then, the best part, the part that is the most awesome: I gotz a photo with the awesome (and bald) Daisy Thomas.
It was pretty special.

Disclaimer: My photos with Reidy, Goldsack, and Daisy are on my friend's camera, so yeah. They may appear on my blag in the near future. Maybe. If I'm nice.

AUS v NZ, Test, Day 4.

2011-12-11T23:29:00.000-08:00

In my previous post, I predicted the outcome of Day 4 of the 2nd Test between Australia and the Kiwis.

I got two of them right: Warner made a century and the middle order collapsed.

Young Warner making his first Test century! :D

I got one half-right: J-Pat got Man of the Series, not Man of the Match.
I got another half-right: Khawaja made 44... divided by 2, and plus 1.
And sadly, it wasn't Starsky nor J-Pat with the winning runs.

It was a real nail-biter, and very nerve-wrecking.
Warner was the only one who made over 30, the rest couldn't do much. Some went for ducks, some went for golden ducks, and some just failed to make more than 10.

In the end, it was down to a gutsy Nathan Lyon (a.k.a. Lord Nate 2.0) who held in there for so long and was a good partner while Warner made the runs.
Warner and Lyon made around 30 runs, and had 7 runs left, when Lyon was clean bowled. :/

It was a good loss, because now the selectors can drop the old guys, and bring in some bright and fresh players.

My ins and outs:
In - Twatto, Wade, some other uninjured player (maybe Dan Christian, or T-Pain).
Out - Haddin.

I really want to write MHuss and Ponting in the "out", because they are not performing like they should. By being in the team, they are stopping young talented cricketers from being chosen.
But I can't.
MHuss has been so good in the past. He's saved our necks, he's held the team together. (Not recently, but you know, whatever).
And Ponting... he's a legend, they can't drop him. I know he should've retired long ago (yesterday, to be exact) but he's had so much success, as captain and as a batsman.
Blah.
I'm so glad that I am not a selector.

That's it for now.
Bye.

MY THOUGHTS ON: CRICKET.

2011-12-11T01:15:00.000-08:00

Just some of my (stupid and not-so-expert) suggestions for the AUS XI (and cricket in general)-

As much as I adore Ponting and ol' man Huss, I hope they do not play well tomorrow. They need to fail, so they get dropped and learn their lessons. We need bright young stars in the team, to provide energy and hope for the future. Is the upcoming Test matches vs India important? Maybe. Is the Ashes important? Hell to the yes.
Haddin should be dropped. Bring in T-Pain or the wonderful Wade. idk, whatever.
Warner, regardless of his near-50 today, should continue to be in the team. He will only get better. His scores, respectively, have been 3, 12, 15, and now 47 not out. Improvement is evident.
J-Pat continue to be in the team, but looked after thoroughly. Injuries need to be avoided, this guy is going places.
Starc (or as I would call him, Starsky) should remain in the team. Less wickets than J-Pat, but still bowls well. Also, he looks like this:

It was sad when Chris Martin didn't get a king pair (two golden ducks in both innings of a Test). I wanted that so badly, hahahaha. :P
Congratz to Warner and Hughes for making a fine partnership. It was good to see. :)
I miss Twatto.
And Mitchie J.
Also, I really wanted to watch Pat Cummins play this summer.
Bowlers' injuries suck.
And getting a piece of metal in your foot. That sucks too.
Sad panda.
Alastair Cook is mighty fine. I cannot wait for the next Ashes.
Pup is beginning to grow on me. I don't like this.
I hope Tendulkar doesn't get his 100th century on our turf.
Fun.
I hope the Aussies win tomorrow. Predictions: Warner will make a century, Khawaja will get to 44, the middle order will collapse, and J-Pat and Starsky will get the remaining runs. Plus, J-Pat for Man of the Match.

MY OFFICIAL RECAP OF ALL THINGS GOOD

2011-12-07T02:06:00.000-08:00

Last night I watched American Horror Story.
It was particularly confusing, with the parents' relationship and Violet freaking out about Tate and his murderous ways.

But overall, it was really good.
Cameron (Eric Stonestreet, dude from Modern Family) was in there, and he was kind of crazy (as is everyone in AHS) and the unfaithful husband (...Ben?) was trying to help him through his problems.
He died anyway. ;___;

The funniest bit was Tate climbing into Violet's bed. Oh my god, how I pissed myself laughing. Oh Tate, you nutter butter, you. <3

Then, today, I watched the fabulous new Glee episode!!
It was so exciting, okay.
Mainly because Sammy Evans was back, omg yay! :D
And he wants Mercedes back. They are an adorable couple, okay. I am such a Fabrevans fan, I really am. But come on, no one can deny the cuteness executed by Sam and Mercedes when they look (or even think) about each other. They are ADORABLE. Absolutely, no questions asked.

Also, my picture below...
(I screen-capped it, but it still came out fuzzy.)
You get the gist though. Brit and Damian hugging and singing together! Yay.
After all that shit in the leprechaun episode, I'm glad these two can be friends. Even if Damian doesn't get his pot of gold. ;)
Plus Lindsay was so good.
She sang a song at Sectionals, which was super good.
But as good as Lindsay was, and as good as the Troubletones were, the New Directions kicked butt.
Okay, it did help that they performed last with a 7 minute performance, which meant they were the freshest in the judges' minds. But whatever. It's still good. :D

And Quinn not being so nutter butters and focusing on enjoying her teenage life = awesomeness!
Yay Quinn, I was starting to think you were officially dead and gone. But now you're back, I love you. :)

And to finish off, I loved it when Santana made one final insult about Finn's fatness and said "It would be rude if I followed you around and everytime you took step, I played a note on a tuba".

The above quote is from Family Guy.
You may watch the hilariousness right here:

STUFF.

2011-12-04T23:56:00.000-08:00

So, Australia managed to win a Test match on home turf (since the disastrous Ashes series, Melbourne and Sydney in particular).
Yay.

But it finished way too early.
I would've liked Chris Martin to smash some fours and stuff, but no, he had to go and get his 31st Test duck. Whatever.
David Warner hit some boundaries to win the game, so that was pretty awesome.

And James Pattinson, a lovely Victorian, got Man of the Match. On his debut! :P

Fun.
After the cricket, I watched Arthur, where there was a blackout and they did fun things with their next-door neighbours. The next door neighbours knew how to survive a blackout, mainly because their Abuela taught them stuff. And I know who an Abuela is. It's their grandma. /proud.
(I probably spelt Abuela wrong. Whatever.)

And then, I watched Celtic Thunder Christmas Special.
Damian McGinty (who was on the Glee Project and then on Glee) was performing with them, wheeeeeeeeee.
Speaking of which, Damian will get more episodes on Glee! THIS IS AWESOME, YOU GUYS, MY CAPS LOCK IS STUCK, OMG.

And Glee is on Wednesday!
Yippee.
And it includes Sam Evans. :D
And they go to Sectionals (which is located at McKinley High so they don't need to have a bake sale to fund for the bus trip).
And Sam will fight to get Mercedes back. Yes! At the end of Season 2, Glee teased us with "Samcedes" and then at the start of Season 3, they were like, "lol jk". And Mercedes moved on to another dude.

Well, you know what?
Finn and Sam should get together to derail this Shane dude.
They both want Shane out of there. Sort of. Maybe. idk about Finn, but I presume he still wants his football scholarship, right? RIGHT?
(Although, his stepdaddy is now a congressman thingy, so he could afford to send Finn to college and Kurt to NYADA, and bang! Finn and Kurt are both happy happy happy.)

And yeah.
Bye.
EDIT: American Horror Story is on tomorrow. Yeah.
Expect a whole recap of it, okay?
Although, my recap will only include Tate and Eric Stonestreet but you know, whatever. :P

NaNoWriMo = SUCCESS.

2011-11-29T17:01:00.001-08:00

I wrote a 50,000 word story in the lovely month of November.
Yes, I know, I had exams. But it's called "copying and pasting song lyrics" okay. That's what I do. It's called skill. I has it.

So, this year, my story was about Alex Fasolo.
And young Alex was playing in his 2nd year at Collingwood, with his best friend Jye Bolton.
Then, Alex meets a lovely girl named Laura (who may or may not have been me- I am like SMeyer, I have to write myself into the story otherwise I'd be a nobody).
Alex and Laura fall in love pretty quick, and realise that they are soul mates.

Plus other shit happens (I have to pad out the story with irrelevant things), but whatever.

Fun!

(I also watched American Horror Story last night. It was pretty cool, except the parents are a little crazy. I think it's the house. The house is turning them nuts. But I love Hayden, okay. And Violet is very calm, I'm glad the house hasn't turned her insane. Oh and Tate is awesome. I just fall more and more in love with him as the episodes go by. Even though he's a psycho. It was pretty cool when the psycho-mother said that Tate was her son. I was like, "Aw, yay, my two favourite characters are siblings!" Even though one of them is dead. I miss Adelaide. Not as much as I miss Zane or Finnick or Prim, but still.)

(Glee is on today too. Channel 10 are just showing repeats each week from now till February. Tonight is the Regionals episode, where Beth is born. It's pretty cool. And they sing Journey. I wish Darren made an appearance, because he was the initial inspiration for the Journey numbers. I mean, if Finn hadn't seen him, Finn would never have chosen Don't Stop Believin' and then Mr Schue would never have chosen to do it at Regionals.)

(The new Glee episode is on in America. I might download it, if I can be bothered. Which I probably can't. I want to download Episode 8 and 9, because they actually feature my gorgeous Sammy Evans. Episode 7 has no interest for me. Santana and Rachel kissing girls? No thanks. Why don't they make out with each other, now THAT would be interesting. Oh there I go, suggesting ideas for Glee again. You better thank me for this, Ryan Murphy!!!)

(Bye.)

FANFIC #82937

2011-11-27T18:24:00.000-08:00

Remember when I used to write fanfics on Mitchell Johnson? Well, don't get too excited, because this fanfic is about Glee. Deal with it.

FANFIC
(Set from the point of view of Sam Evans)

Ah, Astronomy class. The one class where I can sit here and day dream, and if the teacher asks why, I just say "I'm staring at the stars and moon and shit". She leaves me be.

Today, we were learning about the planets. My Very Easy Method Just Speeds Up Naming Planets. I think I will just think about Quinn Fabray, my ex. I really love her, I do. I mean, Mercedes is a good friend and all, but she loves that Shane dude. Anyway, she would only smash rocks into my non-existant car.

After Astronomy comes Glee. I entered the choir room, and people were already there, gazing out the window. I went over there to check out what they were looking at, but Mr Schue walked into the room so I quickly sat down.

"Okay, guys," Mr Schue said, clapping his hands together. Everyone sat down except Blaine.
"Sit down," Finn said.
Blaine sat down.
"Alright," Mr Schue continued, "Your assignment for the week is..." and he wrote something on the board.
It said "A HUMPS". Wait, whut? I looked again, closer. Oh right, "MASH UP". Sorry, I am a little dyslexic.

The next day also happened to be a Glee rehearsal. Man, I see these guys everywhere, are there any other students at this school?
I got there early and headed up to look out the window with the others. As soon as I got there, Quinn approached. Oh crap, should I turn my attention to the window or my crush?
"Hey Sam," she said, smiling.
"Hey," I said, looking at her and away from the window.
"Colour me mine?" she asked.
"I'll colour you yours any day," I said, without even thinking. Oh crud. Now she knows that I want her back.
"See you Friday," she said, and walked away.

Mr Schue came into the room, and again, I missed my window of opportunity to look out there. Crud.

The next day, after an interesting English class where Puck had confessed his love for Ms Corcoran, I headed on to the choir room.
Man, basically all the Glee students are in all my other classes too. No wonder I transferred away from this shit school.

I got to the room and immediately went straight to the window. Kurt was already there, looking out. I positioned a chair, put one foot on---
"Don't climb on the furniture!" Blaine yelled, pointing straight at me.
I quickly took my foot off. "Your boyfriend is allowed to," I told Blaine.
"Yeah, so?" Blaine said, smirking, "We're the hottest couple of the school, we can get away with shit."
I frowned, and sat down sulkily.

So, the next day was Friday. Ugh, if I don't see what's outside the freaking window today, then I will have to wait till Monday. That sucks.
I walked into the choir room for Glee practice, and... no one was there. I was early!
Quickly, I headed to the window.
I had just put both feet on a chair and was rising up when....
"Sammy Evans," I heard from behind me. Crud.
"Hey, Santana," I said, swivelling around and getting down from the chair, "Why are you here? Spying on us?"
"Oh, you just close your big mouth before you swallow me whole," she said, cruelly, "I came to see someone else."
"Well, no one else is here," I said.
Then, all the Glee students walked in, and Santana walked away from me. I saw her whisper something to Finn, and then she was gone.

Friday night came, and Colour Me Mine was fabulous. I painted a coaster for Quinn, and she painted one for me. She wearing one of my old shirts, which had nearly fallen apart.

After a long and boring weekend of doing nothing but watching Star Wars, Monday arrived. I couldn't wait to get to Glee to look out the window, even though the other students were all annoying as shit.
I made sure to get their early, but I ended up walking in the door at the same time as Mr Schue. Damn corridor full of stupid bustling students. Where did all those students come from? They are just nameless extras, at least people actually know my name.

The next day, I had Astronomy right before Glee practice. After a good day dream about Quinn, I excused myself from class five minutes early.
"What for, Samuel?" she asked.
"Oh, Saturn is about to orbit around Jupiter," I lied, "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!"
"Fine," she said.
I headed out, and straight to the choir room.

Kurt and Rachel was already there, discussing musicals and New York and other shit. Finn was glancing out the window.
"Hey," I said, climbing up on a chair next to Finn.
"Hey," he said, absent-mindedly, focussing more on what was outside the window.
I stretched up and peered out the window.
I was so close!
I could see an open field of dried-up grass that went on for miles and miles. I peered closer and closer, trying to see what was so interesting.
My face was inches away from the window, when all of a sudden, I was smashed up against it. All I could hear was laughing from Finn, the little trickster.
This whole window thing was a trick? F*ck this shit, I'm gone.

3rd/4th/5th EPISODE OF AMERICAN HORROR STORY.

2011-11-22T17:39:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I have no idea what episode they're up to in Australia.
This is the 2nd part of Ryan Murphy's spell on me: watch American Horror Story religiously until you have no idea what you're doing.

Anyway, I really like Violet and Tate, not so much as a couple, but as individual characters.
It was so funny when the parents rushed to the hospital, and they're like, "Violet, don't open the door!" and she's like, "What? It's Halloween!"

Also, when Adelaide wanted to be a pretty girl, I was like, "ME TOO! Let's be bffs."
And then, when she died, it was really sad. ;_;
It was much worse though, because I've seen Mean Girls about 100 times, so I could sense what would happen. It made it ten times worse. :/

Although, I'm not sure what happened to Violet. The scary evil guy must have kidnapped her. Maybe it was Tate? Maybe it was the cool-yet-creepy gay dudes?

I like Tate, though. He looks like Sam Evans, but he's psycho and stuff, so I call him Psycho!Sam.
Weird.

Anyhoo, I really want to watch next week.
Why did the woman faint at the sight of the foetus?
What happened to Violet?
And how the heck did that girl get through the cement?
Why am I asking questions to nobody and talking to myself? Is this another part of Ryan Murphy's plan to make me go crazy? :/

CRICKET.

2011-11-20T02:47:00.000-08:00

So, I'm reading Shane Watson's book at the moment.
And I came across something interesting.

In the Ashes series of '10-'11 that us Aussies would like to shove out of our heads forever, the English pace bowlers were really good at swinging the ball (especially reverse swing) whereas the Aussie pace bowlers were struggling to do this.
(Disclaimer: I have no idea what 'swing' is, but just go with this, okay?)

Anyway, in Twatto's book, he mentions that there's different type of balls.
There's a Kookaburra, which they use in Australia. It loses its shine after about 10 overs and sucks at swinging.
Then, there's a Duke. Which is what they use in England. And this ball has this awesome shininess that is easy to polish and you can swing the ball all day. (Also, you'd sweat less in England, so the ball would stay dry and hence swing more.)

My point:
Maybe those ~~bastard~~ English pace bowlers were using their special "Duke" ball. Did anyone check? DID THEY? Maybe the umpire doesn't know, and just assumed all balls are the same. Maybe that's why we lost, our bowlers were using the crappy Kookaburra.

Massive freakout.
Those cheaters.
Steve Finn has some answering to do. Especially to me.
And to think... Alastair Cook, the silly mid-on and chief ball-wiperer, didn't even tell me in one of our ~~sexual~~ encounters.
What the heck.

I hate England even more.
And this theory may not even be right, but you know what? I don't really care. I'd do anything to throw a bit of mud at them. ANYTHING.

BREAKING DAWN.

2011-11-18T01:40:00.000-08:00

I went to see Breaking Dawn Part 1 at the movies today, and feel like blagging about it.

Deal with it. :P

Good parts:

Jacob's abs. Or just Jacob in general. He was wearing clothes most of the time (disappointing) but oh well. He's still awesome and he's mine.

Seth. I love Seth, he is and always will be my favourite character. (I do admit, I forgot his name at the start of the movie, and accidentally called him Sam. I have no idea how this happened.)

Jessica. Always awesome, always one of the best characters. Her wedding toast was funny as. :P

The sex scene. I know it was G-rated and we didn't see Edward's sparkly stuff, but he did break the bed and Bella was covered in feathers when she woke up. Teehee.

Jacob Black.

The choosing of the baby's name was hilarious. Poor Renesme, her name will never be on a coke bottle. :(

Bella drinking blood out of a disposable cup with a straw. Like it was a coke from Macca's or something.

When they recreated the book cover, and Bella and Edward played chess on their honeymoon. Riveting stuff. Edward won every game, except the one in Bella's dream. :P

The Hunger Games trailer before the movie started.

Bad parts:

The birth scene. I had to look away, so. much. blood. Beth's birth was way cleaner, and they sang Bohemian Rhapsody. I was hoping the vampires would just stop and sing, "I'm just a poor boy from a poor family~". Or maybe they should've hired Jonathon Groff. Oh, there I go, suggesting ideas for Twilight again. Jay-sus.

Jacob wearing clothes.

The fact that when Jacob had to convince Bella to give up the baby and save her life, he never said "I told you so" and she never said "did you know 'i told you so' had a brother? His name is shut the hell up." THIS IS BASED ON A BOOK. Read it. Learn your lines, Taylor Lautner, it's not hard. (The Simpsons quotes are always win.)

Jacob wearing clothes.

Nothing much happened, except Bella being pregnant.

The fact that nothing will happen in Part 2, except for a riveting fight with the Volturi. Can't wait. I'll bring a book.

Edward and Jacob not admitting their feelings to each other and cuddling by the fireplace. Massive disappointment.

Anyway, overall, I recommend you go see it. It's a good comedy, you'll get plenty of laughs out of it. Actually, maybe not that many. But still.

Or you can see Part 2, when it comes out. You can watch Bella go hunting, meeting the fabulous and exciting J.J.Jenks, having tea with the Volturi and discussing their feelings, and best of all, watching Jacob and a baby cuddle in front of a fireplace. Steamy!

(Disclaimer: I made up that part about Jacob and the baby. I don't think they do anything like that, they are a pretty boring couple. Sorry for the disappointment.)

AMERICAN HORROR STORY.

2011-11-01T16:02:00.000-07:00

...Is one messed-up show.

Basically, it was created by Ryan Murphy (who created Glee) so what the hell was I expecting?
Anyway, it was interesting.

Before I even get to the family, the little girl, Adelaide, was freaky. Sometimes she'd just APPEAR in the family's house and be like, "You will dieeee."
It's like, "what the hell, man, get out of my house?"
(I think she was Down's syndrome, so we'll just let it slide, shall we?)

Plus, the parents fight so much, mainly because the dad had an affair and the mum is still trying to forgive him.
And the daughter cuts herself and started hanging out with a psycho killer. :P

Plus, their dog barks so much, as if warning that danger will approach. It's like, "CALM DOWN, IT'S JUST A HOUSE!"
Because people died in the house before the family moved in, so maybe the dog can smell the ghosts or something, idk.

Anyhoo, I will tune in next week, mainly because I have no life and have nothing better to do on Tuesdays 9:30, but also because it's kind of interesting. Ryan Murphy must have some kind of spell on me. :/

TIMMY COMMANDEUR APPRECIATION POST.

2011-10-29T23:04:00.000-07:00

Timmy Commandeur wearing a really cool hat.

I had no idea that Timmy and his fellow Operator Please member, Chris, had started a new band (Colour Coding) and that Operator Please was on a hiatus or something, idk.

How could I not know?
I follow Timmy on twitter.

Whatev.
Colour Coding are working on an EP, and I still haven't bought Operator Please's latest album.
I'm so slack. :/

Anyway, this is Timmy dressing up on Halloween:

Yes, that is a Justin Bieber-esque costume.
With the hairstyle.
He should start another band, called the Justin Bieber Experience. Or, if that names seems to be taken, Bieber Fever.

Cool beans.

CHEMISTRY JOKEZ.

2011-10-25T21:37:00.000-07:00

Two scientists walk into a bar

The first scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of H2O”

The second scientist says ‘I’ll have a glass of water too. Wh… why did you say H2O? Like, I know it’s the chemical formula for water and all, but it’s the end of the day and there’s really no need to intentionally over-complicate things like that in a situation outside of work”

The first scientist stares at his drink, angry that his assassination plan has failed.

FUN CRICKET FACTS.

2011-10-23T16:02:00.000-07:00

For all you cricketing fans, here is "Who is the most annoying player?"

Some of the best answers:

"Steve Smith, he just oozes stupidity."

"Mitchell Johnson, he touches me and I don't like it."

"Mitchell Johnson pinches a lot."

"(talking about Mitchie J) eats very well, and when it comes out the other end, it's very smelly."

Other fun facts about irrelevant things: Nathan Hauritz loves gadgets, and is always on the phone. (Probably just to Andrew Hilditch and it's probably just one word: PLEASEEEEEEE.)

HUNGER GAMES.

2011-10-12T22:48:00.000-07:00

I read the Hunger Games trilogy awhile ago, and I never really thought much about this: Why didn't Gale go back to District 12 after the rebellion was over?

District 12 is his home.
Yes, it got bombed during the war, but they didn't bomb the Victor's Village, where there are several lovely modern houses built for the victors of the Hunger Games.

The Capitol were overthrown, I don't think anyone would've minded if people had come back to District 12 to live in those houses.

It's funny, that it's just Katniss, Haymitch and Peeta living there. What about the other houses? What about the 900-something District 12 people who were saved from the bombing?
I know Katniss wasn't too thrilled about Gale's bombs killing her sister, but come on! Gale is a nice guy, he didn't intentionally kill Prim.

Gale and his family could've lived happily in one of the lovely houses, neighbours with Katniss. Maybe Gale could marry some lovely girl (Johanna? Delly Cartwright? ...Effie?), have children, and have dinner parties with Katniss, Peeta and their children.

So, the book wasn't really resolved.
All those houses going to waste, just going to perish into ruins.
I'm sure Gale and Katniss are still bffs and will skip into the forest every day, cuddling in the strawberry patch. WHY CAN'T THIS HAPPEN? WHYYY.

IRISH.

2011-10-10T00:52:00.000-07:00

Marty Clarke, the lovely leprechaun, is back at Collingwood.

Yay!Marty Clarke. :D

He will probably be a forward, because the last time he was at the Pies, he was in defence, and asked Mick Malthouse if he could kick goals like Leon and Didak. Mick said no. Marty was a sad panda, because he wanted to kick goals like he did in Ireland, where the crowd loved him.

Speaking of leprechauns, Damian is on Glee on November 1st!!!! :DDamian, who is so adorable. :D

I'm so excited.
He will live with Brittany, who can't understand his accent and thinks of him as her "own personal leprechaun".

Glee is a very good show, okay. Not because it provides me with entertainment and an excellent storyline, it features unicorns, vampires, and leprechauns.

Yay Glee.

MAD MONDAY

2011-10-03T01:13:00.001-07:00

Daisy Thomas, dressed up as Jesus. :P

Daisy is the Messiah. He just brought along litres of water, and everyone got drunk. Weird.

Plus, Sidey brought the beers:

I'm pretty sure that's Sidebottom in the Duffman outfit. 95% sure.

And Didak just dressed up as himself in the Grand Final. :P
In the photo above, I have no idea who the guy with the beard is. Someone tall and big. Leigh Brown, maybe?

Plus, these are "The Beaks":

L-R: Woody, Travis Cloke, Goldsack, Toovey.

How would they breathe in those outfits?
What the hell?
What if you needed the toilet?
What if you wanted to have a beer?
What if some chess champion walked in the room and started playing? You'd have to stay stationary for years.

Also, down at Geelong:

Jimmy Bartel, as the St Kilda school girl, with ~~his~~ her hotel roommate, Mitchell Duncan.

Aw. They make a great couple. :P
Jimmy loves to have a beer with Duncan... up in a hotel room, cuddling under the doona.

And that's all.
Stay tuned for next week: Undercover chessboards go searching for Wally, and order a jet ski to speed across the ocean, almost knocking into Jesus having a leisurely stroll, and end up stranded on a beach, looking up at Ricky Nixon and his 17-year-old girl staring down from a 20-storey balcony.

FRIDAY.

2011-09-30T02:01:00.000-07:00

I went to Collingwood's training today.
It was amazing, they all trained well and are totally ready to smash some pussy cats tomorrow. :P

I didn't go to the parade though, so I missed out on this:

Sinclair and Faz, being awesome as per usual. :)

But I went to watch Fright Night instead.
It was really scary, I had to cover my eyes when the evil vampire was biting people's necks. :/
But there was Barty Crouch (a.k.a. David Tennant) who was really funny and liked to walk around shirtless and drink martinis.
Plus, DYLAN. From Modern Family.

"Do you wanna do me, do me? I just wanna do you, do you.. underneath the moonlight."

But he was barely in the movie. :(.
I kept thinking he would bring out his guitar and start serenading me random girls walking past.
And he was in the car with his friend, and they were like, "Hey, what's up with Charlie?" and Dylan goes, "He's paranoid. I was paranoid when I saw a carrot with a machete." And then, they died and I was sad. RIP Dylan. I love you. ;_;

Oh and there was this Spanish woman in the movie, and she totally reminded me of Gloria from Modern Family. But I was like, "Nahh, it can't be".
Then, on further investigation (i.e. Wikipedia searchings), I found out that the Spanish woman is not Sofia Vergara (a.k.a. Gloria) but her sister, Sandra.

Speaking of siblings, James Franco's brother was in the movie too.

Anyhoo, it was totally worth it.
I'd totally suggest for you guys to see it, but it's been at the cinemas for awhile, I think, so it's cinema-screening may be ending soon.
Get it out on DVD. Totally worth it. :D

GLEE.

2011-09-28T18:23:00.001-07:00

Last night's episode was so awesome, you guys.
It was full of unicorns and Kurt and Beth.

Brittany makes a wonderful unicorn. :P

"What do you call a unicorn with no horns? A friggin' horse!"

Jokes aside, I love Kurt more than ever. His first audition was AMAZING. I totally loved it. :D
And Beiste, Artie & Emma were so awful to him.
First of all, Beiste said that he "was too much of a lady" (or something like that) and "too delicate" to be Tony.
Now, I don't know Tony (having never ever seen West Side Story), but Beiste is such a hypocrite.

Kurt is too much of a girl? Really?
Well, you certainly are not a girl, Beiste! Eating a whole freaking chicken at every meal? Oh yes, because that's sooooo lady-like. I can just imagine some Southern belle back in the 1800's scoffing down a whole chicken.
So, shut up, Beiste. Just shut it.

And then, in Kurt's second audition, where he was Romeo, and Rachel was Juliet, Beiste & co were laughing at him!
The kid is trying his best, acting his little heart out, and they laugh at him.
What kind of guidance counselor are you, Emma?
Aren't you meant to be an outcast, Beiste? Trying to fit in?
And Artie? I HATE YOU.

Kurt, you did a wonderful job at being manly and straight.
You make a great Romeo.
I'm sure you'd make a great Tony.

And for the first time since he's been at McKinley, I love Blaine.
Yay Blaine, go you good thing!
Keep refusing to be Tony. They can't force you to be Tony. Don't do it, Blaine! We can have slumber parties and paint each other's nails with all the shades of pink! :D

Oh and Quinn. She was so good at being punky, stealing people's lunch money and yelling at Mr Schue.
And when she saw the picture of Beth... it was so sad. ;_;

Puck and Beth. It looks like Puck has styled Beth's hair into a mohawk. :P

Beth and Puck were so awesomeeeee, and the Clown Pig that he drew. Awww! :D

I have really missed Beth. And Shelby/Idina/whateverrrrr.
I was so happy when they both came back! It had seemed, for awhile, that Glee had forgotten about little Beth. :/

One rant about Quinn: YOU CAN'T GET FULL CUSTODY OF BETH.
What are you talking about, Quinn?
You gave her up for adoption! Shelby signed the papers and now OWNS Beth.
Just shut up, Quinn. Go back to underneath the bleachers, okay?
You don't deserve Beth anyway. Just like Shelby doesn't deserve Rachel.

Anyhoo, make sure you all tune in for Glee next week.
I hope Blaine still refuses Tony.

YAY DANE SWAN.

2011-09-26T18:46:00.000-07:00

Swanny won the Brownlow last night. :D
The picture above is from a few years ago, but it involves Swanny's cool hat and tattoos, plus My Own Personal Leprechaun, ~~Damian~~ Marty Clarke.

Anyway, my point is...
The last time a Collingwood player won the Brownlow in the same year as Collingwood winning the premiership was 1930.

Now, time for a bit of History:
1930.
When the Cats beat the Pies twice; once in the home-and-away season, and once in the preliminary final. (Really confusing, no idea how the system worked back then.)
And in October, for the big Grand Final, the Pies beat Geelong.

Bring it on, pussy cats. :P

IN THE GRAND FINAL!

2011-09-23T17:48:00.000-07:00

Marching to October, thanks to pinching a win from the Hawks' little hands.
We're gonna smash some Eagles next week. :D

Jarryd Blair is tasting a Starburst-combination of victory. Yum.

Yay.
I only watched the first half, haha I get too scared, shut up.
(The Emmys were so good, though. Jane Lynch sung a really cool song about TV and how awesome it is, and then threw a slushie in Sue's face, ha! And Modern Family had won about 289383 awards before I flicked it back over to the footy just in time to see Mick shed a tear.)

Mick, with his cool hat. It's awesome. :P

Anyhoo, apparently Jolly and Reidy have hurted their legs, and Maxy broke his ribs? Ugh. Hopefully, the Eagles can punch some pussy cats today (and vice versa, depending on who wins).
Luckily, we've got Goldsack to fill in for Reid, right? And Woody can play too, I guess, and then Alex Fasolo for... I don't know, whatever. Just stick Faz in the team, okay.

Go pies. :D

GLEEEEE.

2011-09-22T02:15:00.000-07:00

This is Lindsay.
She came 3rd/4th in the Glee Project, and was on Glee last night. She is lovely, and one of the reasons that I will watch Season 3 of Glee. Other reasons: Damian and Samuel. :D

It was awesome.
Except I don't like Mercedes, because she's just moved on so casually from Sam. As if you just do that! If me and Sam were dating, and then he left to go to another state, I'd be devastated. I would become like Bella, just sitting in my room all day erry day.

And I hate Mr Schue.
He rejected Sugar because she couldn't sing. I HATE YOU, WILL!
And the whole part (or parts) with Emma and Mr Schue were awful. Ugh. Can't believe I shipped those two in Season 1. :/

I loved Quinn's pink hair, and punk attitude.
I didn't like how she didn't get shown much in the Glee episode. But what do I expect? The whole thing is basically Rachel and Kurt, plus Blaine, and then Mr Schue & Emma.
Even when Sam was on the show, he barely got any screen time. :/

Anyhoo, can't wait for next Wednesday!! :D
Hopefully, Damian or Samuel will be there, because I love them so much.

BUTTERCUP

2011-09-16T23:52:00.000-07:00

Remember my Hunger Games soundtrack Parts 1 & 2?
Well, I need a song for Buttercup.
I don't want Buttercup to sing anything (that would be weird), but just when the cat is introduced in the movie, there should be a song and Buttercup will sit there, all badass and protective-y.

I was thinking Build Me Up Buttercup, but well, that has nothing to do with Buttercup besides the fourth word in the title.

Hmm, maybe U Can't Touch This by MC Hammer.
Totally.

Buttercup is very similar to Lord Tubbington.
The movie should consist of Prim feeding Buttercup some goat's cheese and Katniss will be like, "...Ew" and Prim will be like, "Buttercup only consumes human food".
idk.
Whatever.

Perfect song: Hate On Me. idk who sang it, but it was on Glee.
Add this to the soundtrack.
It shall be played for Buttercup, showing a bit of his background, such as Katniss trying to drown him and Katniss hating him, and then him looking fondly at Prim.

...I think.

THE GLEE PROJECT.

2011-09-16T04:32:00.000-07:00

This is Damian.
Damian, meet the readers of my blag.

For all of you who haven't heard, Damian won the Glee Project.
(Well, it was a tie between Samuel and Damian, but I think it's safe to say Damian won.)

He gets to be on SEVEN Glee episodes.
I wonder what character he'll play. He's so cute and lovable. :D
And I wonder if they will have subtitles for him.
His accent is amazing, you guys.
Well, all irish accents are amazing, duh.

And Lindsay gets to be in two episodes of Glee.
YAAAAAY.
She's so adorable.

So excited for Season 3 of Glee.
It starts on Wednesday at 8:30pm.

The only downside is little Sammy Evans won't be there. Whyyyyy. He was the best. THE. BEST. He sang Justin Bieber songs and Friday and he made them good. He dated Quinn, and she was mean and cheated on him, then dated Santana and she was mean and teased his mouth and moved on to Karofsky without telling him, and then Mercedes ~~who probably smashed the windows on his motel room~~ who is a wonderful girl and totally deserved Sam.

Creys.
BUT ENOUGH CRYING, DAMIAN IS HEREEEE. He will make everything good again. He will fill the hole in my heart that Sam has vacated. He will stop all the crying. He will make sure the sun is shining. He will stop me using the lyrics from Songbird and turning them to poo. (Apologies to Fleetwood Mac, sorry, won't happen again.)

Anyhoo, see you next time. :D

FUN FACTS:

2011-09-15T16:52:00.001-07:00

Dayne Beams has big ears.

People who shouldn't shave their heads: Daisy Thomas, and Alex Fasolo.

Ben Johnson is a "grumpy old man".

Dawes is spending his free time doing a Property essay, i.e. uni work, I guess. Massive nerd right there. Not even I do essays. The last essay I did was on Genetically Engineered Salmon and I never want to see salmon ever again in my life.

Fasolo is nicknamed "Onions". You wanna know why? Because when you look at him, you cry.

Above: My response to why Faz is called "onions". Absolutely pmsl-ing. :P

Alex Fasolo has one serious list of nicknames: Faz, Beyonce Bum, Fatsolo or Fatolo (depending on how you wish to spell it) and Onions.

Dawes is skilled at giving death stares.

And that's it! Stay tuned for next edition of the blag: When I go crazy over Alex Fasolo. Oh wait... that's every week. Oops.

HUNGER GAMES SOUNDTRACK -- Part 2.

2011-09-10T23:39:00.000-07:00

Remember my "Hunger Games soundtrack" blag post?

Yeah, I have some new additions.

Defying Gravity from Wicked. Rue could sing this, as she flies from tree to tree. Maybe when she's in the private session for the Gamemakers, they could show a bit of her background and then show her flying around the Training Centre. (Or Katniss could sing it, idk.)
Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. Something for Gale/Liam Hemsworth to sing. If this is going to be a musical, we need ALL the characters to have a performance. Gale shall sing this in the woods, with no one around, when he's thinking of Katniss and such. idk. He can be all like, "Let's run away and never look back" or something. idk the lyrics. Whatever.
Grenade by Bruno Mars. (or technically, any other Bruno Mars song, they all serve the purpose) This is sung by Peeta/JHutch. He can sing it in the arena, or before the arena, I don't even know. It would suit him well, to be like, "I would jump in front of a train for yaaa~" which equals "get cut by Cato for yaaaaa".

And yeah.
Hopefully, I get paid in royalties for this. Think of all that money Suzanne Collins will make from this movie if she uses my ideas. And if she uses my ideas, I will be RICH.
Hahahaha.
And if she refuses to acknowledge me, my gremlins will eat her alive and set fire to her family. Or maybe my lawyers will sue her, I don't know, whatever.

FUN.

2011-09-10T02:40:00.000-07:00

One goal assist, a mark, and a goal after the siren, for the wonderful Alex Fasolo. All in about 10 minutes.

Poor Reidy was injured, so little Faz got to come in and warm up the bench.
Then, when Didak had run his little heart out in his 200th, they sent Fasolo on at about the 15-minute mark of the 4th quarter.
And that was a great decision! After seriously lacking in the goal department on the 4th quarter, Faz handballed to Lukey Ball, and BAM. Straight into the prelim, watch out Daisy and Reidy, your spots are totally not there. :P

Oh and who said Neon Leon couldn't play finals? WHO?
Leon was fabulous, as per usual. :D
Basically the whole defence was good, so who needs Reid?

Pretty sure Collingwood escaped without an injury. Epic win.
(Although, idk why Didak was subbed off, maybe just resting his tired little legs? And apparently Toovey had some "medical issues" but I hope those are okay.)
(Speaking of Tooves, he's up for a logie with his Neighbours role of Creepy Pervy Guy #1. Maybe even a recurring role?)

Alex Fasolo ftw~.

2011-09-08T18:06:00.000-07:00

It sucks when you get kicked out of the team because the coach prefers a player that either has a broken thumb, coming back from a hamstring injury, or hasn't played in 8 weeks.

But don't you worry, Alex Fasolo is still amazing. :D

Anyway, I hope Collingwood can beat West Coast on Saturday. :D

2011-09-07T05:04:00.000-07:00

Two blag posts in a day, but this is important.

I have never noticed this before.
They are, like, twins.
TWINS.

Holy crap.

HUNGER GAMES SOUNDTRACK.

2011-09-06T15:22:00.000-07:00

As you all know, or should know, the Hunger Games movie coming out next year.
I don't know if they've chosen a soundtrack, but just in case they haven't, I'm here.

These are songs that I think should be in the movie, preferably sung by the respective actor. Musicals are awesome, okay. Dig it.

Maybe This Time from Cabaret. This will be sung by Elizabeth Banks, at the reaping. Instead of saying, "May the odds be ever in your favour", why not channel your inner Liza Minelli and sing it?
Songbird by Fleetwood Mac. Remove the lullaby that Katniss sings to Rue in the book. There's no need for it. Jennifer Lawrence will sing "and the songbirds keep singing, like they know the scoreee~, and I love you I love you I love you like never beforeee~" etc etc. It totally fits, okay. TOTALLY.
A Muse song. Time Is Running Out or something like that. They need a good rebellion song to play at the end, when Katniss presents the berries. Or at the very end, on the train home. Which will link up Hunger Games with the next movie, y'know. They don't necessarily have to sing this song.

And that's it.
I should direct a movie one day, I'd be so great. :D
Stay tuned for next week: when I crap on about Alex Fasolo.

FUN.

2011-09-05T00:54:00.000-07:00

My Dream Team lost the grand final.
Okay, I was only in the finals for the bottom 8, and half my players got "rested" in Round 24 so I really didn't have much hope. :(
(Luckily I didn't have any Hawthorn players, lol.)

Anyway, TAYG was hilarious last night.
Basically, they all swapped places.
Shaun Micallef did a good job at being Josh Thomas, imitating his accent and his standing-up-when-answering-a-question. :P
And Amanda was pretending to be Shaun, so she was the host. And she sang "What's A Doodle Doo", and was so good at copying Shaun, hahaha.
And one of the games was Trust Me, where one person was turned into a Human Parfait. Which, to Amanda's obvious amusement, happened to be Shaun. :P

And Natalie Tran (the guest for Gen Y who I didn't know existed until last night, but she's really cool and I am now following her on Twitter) pretty much answered every question correctly, but Amanda, being evil, twisted things a little and poured the three ingredients for the parfait all over Shaun. :D

Anyway, on with this blag.
There are two winners for the Glee Project (who get to be on 7 episodes of Glee), and then the other members of the top 4 get to be on two episodes of Glee.
I hope Damian, Samuel or Lindsay wins. Or Alex, I don't really care. THEY ARE ALL WINNERS, YAAAAY!

More good news, HEATH SHAW COMES BACK NEXT WEEK! To smash some Eagles, mwa ha ha ha. :P
And Daisy comes back the following week, yay. :)

FOOTY.

2011-08-21T01:23:00.000-07:00

Faz and his epic boots are cooler than all of you.
Deal with it.
:P

Anyway, Collingwood managed to beat the Lions last night. Yay!

Clokey kicked 5 goals, and is now EIGHT GOALS away from Buddy on le Coleman medal thingy.
~~I hope Buddy falls off a cliff and breaks both his legs~~ I mean, what? I love Buddy, of course I do. I'd never wish such a cruel thing on poor little Buddy...

Oh and Mick Malthouse gave S.Bucks a spray at Quarter Time.
Either Simon Buckley scratched his key on Mick's car, or... idk, whatever.

My point is, I don't think Mick will be coaching the Demons next year. I mean, I'm sure he has nothing against the Demons and everything, but after having to put up with one Demon player for a year, Mick wouldn't want to put up with 40 of them. I mean, that's a bit risky for his car...

I still love S.Bucks, though. He's so cute, and always tries hard. :D
And Ben Sinclair played so well yesterday!
Same with Tom Young. He kicked two goals, one of them being a torp. And they doused him in red powerade at the end. Hahahaha. :P

I hope Faz gets to play next week. And Sharrod and Leon and Toooooooooves. All those awesome people that came from Perth. :)

Top of the ladder, yo.

GLEE PROJECT.

2011-08-19T20:46:00.000-07:00

This lovely girl was eliminated from The Glee Project last night.
BLAH.
Her name was Marissa and she had banana earrings. YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID, RYAN MURPHY.

The episode was tenacity (with Karofsky chucking slushies at them!) or TE-NASTY as Alex said.

If you don't know Alex, he's one of the contestants on The Glee Project. GET WITH THE PROGRAM. Geez.
And he would be the offspring of Kurt and Mercedes, if they had children together.
And he's like tall and big and everything, so he comes across as really tough and strong, yet when he talks, his voice is like a girl's, so he's all sweet and soft.
Aw. :)

What's the point of this blag post, I hear you ask?
Well, there's no point. Since when have you read a post on here that has a point? You just wasted about 5 minutes of your life that you will never get back. :P

ALEX FASOLO AND THE GLEE PROJECT.

2011-08-12T22:36:00.000-07:00

Daicos who?

And Collingwood wins another one, yay!

An awesome number 35 kicked a goal and took a specky because he's awesome and everything. :P
Just take the whole bus, Alex Fasolo.
Congratulations on your existence. :D

Not all good news, with one of my favourites on The Glee Project getting eliminated.
HOW DARE THEY?
The really short guy, Matheus, who's like shorter than Jarryd Blair (I know, it's ridiculous, how could little Blairy be taller than anyone?) got eliminated. Sulk.
He was so cool.

But it's okay.
Damian is still there (he's the Irish one) and Lindsay and Samuel. :)
And I really like Marissa too. She's got red hair and is really pretty and I didn't really notice her till last night's episode. :/

But it was funny how Cameron got kissed by Lindsay, and rang his mum to cry about it because he's all Christian and stuff.
Like, if I were in Cameron's position, being kissed by Lindsay (or anyone, for that matter), I'd call EVERYONE and be like, "I just got kissed! GET THE CAKE AND BALLOONS OUT, PARTY TIEMZZZ!"
And we'd all celebrate me not being a kissing virgin anymore. Yay.

Fun.

Top of the ladder, yo.

FOOTY.

2011-08-07T02:46:00.000-07:00

Happy 250th, Taz. :)

Half good and half bad weekend of footy.
Collingwood won.
Freo lost. :(
My Dream Team and Supercoach lost, ugh.
I lost to one of the bottom teams in the Dream Team. So annoying. Two of my players were injured, and, of course, I didn't have a reserve. FAIL WHALE.

So, I probably won't get to be 6th on the ladder. Still stuck in 8th, or if I'm really unlucky, NINTH.
Blah.

There's more bad news.
Travis Cloke, ex-sufferer of the dreaded yips, caught up to Buddy Franklin on the Coleman medal goalkicking thingy.
And then, today, Buddy just had to go and kick 3 goals. WHAT EVEN.
(And to make matters worse, Riewoldt kicked 4 goals and is equal with Buddy.)

WHY? WHYYYY?
Why didn't I break Buddy's legs?
:P

(Quotes from Futurama are very bubbly-making.)

THE FUTUREEEEEEEE

2011-08-04T04:48:00.000-07:00

Heath Shaw will jet off to the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing.

I called it. I totally wrote, on a previous blag post, that this will happen. I predicted THE FUTURE.
Hahahaha.

By the way, the Powerball numbers are 2, 13, 17, 22, 32 and the PB is 35.
Enjoy. :)
Also, there will be hoverboards in the near future. With crash bracelets and belly sensors and grippy shoes.

(After reading the Uglies trilogy by Scott Westerfeld, I want a hoverboard. Hurry up and invent them, you inventors! What are you doing? Why do I not have my hoverboard yet? What is taking so long?)

Whatever.

FOOTY.

2011-07-31T01:39:00.001-07:00

Ben Sinclair, doused in Powerade. :D

Massive comeback by the mighty Pies!
Down by 30 points or something, but there was never a doubt for them EVER.

Alex Fasolo (above) kicked a 5-faaaa, putting his AFL goal tally to 9. He has kicked the second-highest amount of goals at Collingwood in a number 35 jumper.
He may get a Rising Star nomination (yay!) and hopefully, a spot in the team when all the other players get back from injury. :P

And Clokey is only THREE GOALS away from Buddy Franklin for the Coleman medal.
Yay.

Such a good win.
Hopefully, Daisy can come back next week. Surely a corked thigh can't be THAT bad.
I mean, that Hardingham dude was running around today with a corked leg. Yes, he may have been sore at some points and really should've had a rest, but he was out there for pretty much the whole game. *shrug*

Essendon had so many injuries, though. Basically, that's probably how they lost, not having many interchanges.
I suppose that is the worst thing about being a top team, injuries are more likely if your team is working hard, all day at training, in the gym, at a game, trying to improve.

Top of the ladder, yo.

HARRY POTTER!!

2011-07-29T02:08:00.000-07:00

Took me about two weeks, but I finally saw Harry Potter 7 and a 1/2.

It was AWESOME.
Move over Fabrevans, I like Romione so much more.
When they were in the Chamber of Secrets, the moment was so bubbly and then, out of nowhere, the kiss! It was wonderful, and magical and I.. um.. kind of squealed a little bit. Shut up.

Romione have such cute moments, though. Like, in the 6th movie, with Ron in hospital, and Lavender Brown was all like, "WON-WON" and Ron was like, "Err-my-nee" and it was like ADORABLE and BUBBLY and ahhhhhh.

Anyway, whatever.
I loved the Neville killing Nagini part (I silently clapped at that part), the "you and whose army" bit, the awkward hug with Draco and Voldemort (lol), Snape and Lily (Snape: Always. Me: CREYS), Snape in general, Fred Weasley (noooo!), when McGonagall said, "I've always wanted to use that spell" and I went "Nawww" cos she's so cute, Molly Weasley, etc etc.

And, of course, when Harry broke the elder wand and I channeled my inner Damian (from Mean Girls) and gasped.

All in all, AMAZING.
You should go and see it.
All of you.
Why are you all still sitting here? You already saw it? SEE IT AGAIN.

P.S. lol, I almost left the cinema before the movie even started. They had a preview for Breaking Dawn and I was like, "No. You don't even go here." Rude. But I stayed and commentated the whole preview to my friend, who's never read the book. I was like, "That's the sex scene. That's where she's preggerz. The baby eats her. They have to dig the baby out. Bella nearly dies." etc etc. (But the sex scene was pretty cool, they were in bed and the whole roof nearly collapsed. Or something. I think that was the sex scene. Whatever.)

EDIT: But I like Twilight okay, don't get me wrong. It's good, I read the books, they were fabulous, I watched the first two movies, they were fabulous.
I just disagree with splitting Breaking Dawn into two movies.
Yes, the last Harry Potter movie was split into two, but that was because there was SO MUCH in the book, jam packed with SO MUCH.
What happens in Breaking Dawn? A wedding, a sex scene, preggerz, baby tries to kill Bella from inside, Bella nearly dies, Bella changes into vampire, pedo-wolf, Bella adjusts to being a vampire, Bella finds J.Jenks, a "fight" with the Volturi, happy ending.

Not much involved.
Surely SMeyer has enough money.
Her house is solid gold.
She sleeps on a bed made out of money.
SURELY, this stupid movie does not need to be broken up into two movies.
What the hell.

The fight was only good, because it involved Bella wanting to fight, wanting to save her friends, her baby, her new vampire family.
And if Bella didn't put the shield up, the Volturi's attack would've been stupid, their fighting technique wasn't very... interesting.
It didn't involve wands and magic. It didn't involve running and chasing their enemies. It just... was through the mind. Which is lame. Sorry, Stephenie Meyer, your book is really good. Just... idk.

Cooool.

2011-07-26T15:19:00.000-07:00

Did I mention how I got 8 in my footy tipping last weekend?
Well, I DID.
:P

And my Dream Team won, and is now in the Top 8 on the ladder! Go me.
And for the last home-and-away Dream Team round, I am playing one of the bottom teams.
All I have to do is thrash the poor sucker, and 6th place is MINE.
So bubbly-making.

In other news, I'm reading the Uglies series at the moment.
It is very exciting.
I'm up to the 3rd book, Specials.
Basically, I totally shipped Tally & David, and then when Zane came along.. Well, Zane kind of rocked my world.

And Dr Cable is awful. But that's her job, so I guess it's okay.
But it's not Maddy's job to be cruel, yet she is so mean to Tally.
Okay, her husband died and it was all Tally's fault. Fair enough. But it's not ALL Tally's fault. Yes, she betrayed the Smoke, I get it. But Maddy knew about the risks of escaping the city, she knew what the Specials would do to someone who knows the truth about the operation.
She KNEW.
Why is she being a bitch to Tally?
Because Tally ruined her and her family's life and home?
Because David loves Tally so much and Tally goes and dates another guy?
Because David still has feelings for Tally, pretty or not?

Screw Maddy.
No wonder Tally didn't choose David at the end of the Pretties book.
It wasn't to do with Zane's big beautiful eyes, and his gorgeous pretty face.
It wasn't that David was ugly and Tally didn't want to look at him.
It was his MOTHER. His psycho-bitch mother, controlling him, informing him that pretty people aren't the same as when they were ugly.
Well, Maddy, I think Tally has proved that she CAN be the same, due to some bubbly activities and whatever, you're totally wrong. Go away.

A bit of a rant and a few spoilers, but DEAL WITH IT. :P
Also, Zane is a really cool name. I want one of my children to be named Zane. Or, as I will be a crazy cat lady in the future, one of my cats.

TV.

2011-07-22T04:22:00.000-07:00

This is Hayden.
Eliminated from Masterchef just before the final 5.

It is sad that he left. Utterly bogus.
He was one of the best cooks in the competition and was so hot, he could easily melt butter.

So, there goes my viewing of Masterchef.
But I've found a better reality TV show.
THE GLEE PROJECT.
Heard of it?
It's like American Idol, as they have auditions and from those auditionees, they choose a top 12 and eliminate a contestant every week.
But instead of a record deal and some cash, the winner gets a few episodes on Glee. :D

I have my favourites.
Damian, who has an Irish accent and I just wish he could talk FOREVERRR.
Ellis, who is so tiny and cute and looks like a 10-year-old. (But she got eliminated, so much creys.)
Lindsay. Massive bitch-making, hahaha. Entertaining, utterly. :P
Alex. He's a guy with a girl's voice, what more could you want? I said, WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT? That's right, nothing. NOTHING.
Samuel. Totally.
The short guy, Matheus or whatever. He sang Gives You Hell and I nearly died from all the awesomeness. Ah.

And that is all, my pretty-minded friends.
Tune in to The Glee Project on Friday nights on Eleven, if you're not too busy with your important lives.

2011-07-19T23:11:00.000-07:00

For someone who has so many different hair colours that they've forgotten their natural shade, Jason Akermanis is so right.

Usually I skip over his articles, they're just his weird opinions, usually about some bogus thing that I have no interest in whatsoever.

But he's really hit the nail on the head with this one.
Here I was, thinking that Heath Shaw's penalty was fair, that the bet was stupid and totally against the rules and Heath deserved every part of the penalty.
But compared to other things, other events that have happened in the wide world of football, a $10 bet is not so bad.

Read the article, dudes. Go and read about Jason Akermanis' bubbly opinions, showing that the AFL aren't always fair, dishing out their penalties and stuff.
:P

FUN.

2011-07-17T18:00:00.000-07:00

Good weekend of footy.

Collingwood won.
Melbourne won.
Freo won.
My Supercoach team won.
...and my Dream Team lost. (But I made over 2000 points, so surely that's a good thing, am I right?)

The coolest person you will ever meet. :D

Although, my footy tips didn't go very well, I only got 3. But when do I ever go well in footy tipping?
NEVER.
I completely suck at it.
Why do I even bother?

Heath Shaw. :/

2011-07-14T23:07:00.000-07:00

Ugh.
8-week suspension for Heath Shaw, for betting on Nick Maxwell kicking the first goal in Round 9.
8 weeks, from Round 17 to 24.
I hope he learns his lesson, and doesn't do anything silly for the next 8 weeks, so that he doesn't have to carry out the full 14 weeks. That would suck.

But due to my optimism and looking on the bright side, here are the positives:

He learned his lesson from that other scandal, the drunk driving thing. I don't think Heath will LIE about this, DENY that he had this bet. That would get him in a much bigger pickle.
My Supercoach team is already crap, I knew that already. I'm on the bottom, or near to it, and I just made a substitution for Heath Shaw. All is well, on that account.
It's about time Shaw had a rest, he's been a super player, always playing well, working hard, dishing out instructions to everyone, including the coach and captain. There are several younger players, waiting in the wings, ready to play. S.Bucks and Goldsack, maybe Macaffer could play Shaw's role?
My Dream Team doesn't have Heath Shaw. That's gotta be a good thing, right? RIGHT?!
He can still play in the finals, if he's a good boy.

Maybe Heath Shaw can go on a holiday to Arizona.
Didak and Dawes and Dayne Beams can go too, a nice relaxing time in the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing. They all could do with a bit of healing, with Didak, Dawes and Beams all injured and Shaw in desperate need of a few brain cells.

Maybe the little pixies and their fairy dust can weave their magic, creating hundreds and hundreds of grey matter, enough to fill the space between Heath Shaw's ears. (And mine too, I wouldn't mind some of those cells, to close my gap.)

And yeah.

YAY.

2011-07-09T23:04:00.001-07:00

Fun fact: Collingwood has never beaten North Melbourne by more than 113 points since 1926 or something.

And, much to the radio commentators' excitement (and mine), the Pies made history, thrashing the Kangas by 117 points.
Steele Sidebottom, in his 50th game, kicked 4 goals. :D
And Lachlan Keeffe made his debut, took a few strong marks, etc.

2nd-gamer Lukey Rounds had the job on Brent Harvey, and holy crap, he actually did a good job! Rounds managed to stick with the Kangas skipper for most of the day, limiting him to 2 goals and just 12 disposals.

Swanny is well and truly fit from his relaxing holiday at the Magical Gypsy Land of Healing. He managed about 38 disposals, and 2 goals.

Not all good news for Collingwood, with my ~~pretend~~ boyfriend Daisy Thomas getting an ankle injury just before half time.
I'm not really sure what happened, but he came back on the field in the 3rd quarter and got some possessions and another goal, so I thought that everything was okay.
But just before 3/4 time, Daisy was substituted, so the ankle injury must have been worse. idk.

Oh and Alex Fasolo managed to keep up his 1-goal-per-game quota. Four for you, Alex, go you good thing!!

Top of the ladder, yo.

FRIDAY NIGHTS AT ZOIDBERG'S.

2011-07-09T18:54:00.000-07:00

I went to La Porchetta on Friday night, and then, after a nutritious dinner of pizza and chips, we went outside in the freezing cold, across the parking lot to McDonald's.
Then, as we shivered from a brief exposure to the cold, we got soft serve cones/sundaes/mcflurries for dessert.

True story of me and my friends' insanity, and the fact that I still do not know where to put the apostrophes.

SPOILERS AHOY!

2011-07-03T22:33:00.000-07:00

This is in the preview for Masterchef on Wednesday night.
We know that Dani gets into an immunity challenge, we found out last night.
But does she win?
Well, this is usually answered on Tuesday night, when the immunity challenge is done.

But they already showed a preview of the wednesday night's episode.
And they showed Dani.
And if you look closely (at the picture below), there's a little gold badge on her apron.

SHE WON AN IMMUNITY PIN.

Hahaha.
Go Dani.
:D

FUN.

2011-07-02T19:03:00.000-07:00

Collingwood are one step closer to being Top Of The Ladder again.

Because Essendon beat the pussy cats.
Hahahaha.
:P

Basically, Collingwood and Geelong have the same amount of losses and once Geelong have their second bye, we're moving on up to higher ground, where the grass is greener, the view is magnificent, and the food is fabulous. We don't have to sit underneath, waiting for the scraps, having poop and kitty litter falling on our heads.

It will be marvelous.

AWESOMENESS.

2011-06-28T20:32:00.000-07:00

It's Brent Macaffer!
Haven't seen him in awhile, ay?
He's been to California (during the off-season) and had a palm tree tattooed on.
Is it meant to symbolise something? Or is it just a palm tree?
Hmm...

Here's something to swoon over:

COOOOL.

2011-06-25T00:19:00.001-07:00

And Jack Watts ruins my footy tipping YET AGAIN.
How was I meant to know that Richmond were worse than Melbourne?
How was I meant to know that Jack Watts would kick 3 goals and play really really well?
~~How was I meant to know the umpires would favour the crap out of Melbourne?~~
HOWWW?

Anyway, I gots some luck.
Cyril Rioli and Brad Sewell won't play next week due to injuries.
Hahahaha.
That's a few less things to worry about. :P

La la laaaaaa.
Yay for New York!
Marriage equality ftw!
:D

Let out the gay within.

NEWS.

2011-06-20T21:01:00.000-07:00

Finished all my exams.
Now to sit back and do nothing till next semester. :P

Anyway, on to some more serious news:

Buddy Franklin only gets suspended for a week.
Noooo.
I'd prefer if he didn't get suspended AT ALL. Because then, he'd be playing against Essendon, and he (and his stupid dirty teammates) would go all dirty on Bombers, fightin' and all that.
But now with this one week suspension, he will definitely play against Collingwood. Unless I can somehow push him off a cliff, hahaha.

The members of the Glee Club will graduate at the end of Season 3.
22 episodes left of this current cast before they all leave. ;_;
Can't they be sophomores forever?
Why do they need to graduate?
Why do they need to grow up?
Whyyyy.
Apparently, all the actors on Glee are 26 or 27 years old in real life. And the characters are all around 16 or 17 and in school. Big age difference.
I will miss the current cast.
Even if they get more actors once the current ones leave, it won't be the same. I, and all the other Glee fans, have got attached to this cast, this quirky bunch of characters.
It will be sad, to watch their graduation. :(

Last bit of serious news:
IT'S DAISY THOMAS' BIRTHDAY TODAY!!
No idea why it is a public holiday for this momentous occasion. The queen gets one, why can't Daisy?
Whatev. Let's call it "Dale Thomas Appreciation Day".
Everyone gets cake.

Quick update

2011-06-19T18:37:00.000-07:00

My Dream Team won.
Supercoach lost.
I got 7 in my footy tipping.

But I totally would've tipped 8, if the Demons weren't so mean.
Just because Freo hasn't won a game at the MCG since Jesus was here, that doesn't mean ANYTHING.

Gosh, Jack Watts, just because I like you, doesn't mean you can go around thrashing Freo's pants off. Rude.